Anais Pt V. A Self Portrait. Amera Ziganii Rao Photography
Writings :: The Letter Series :: Ascension Discourse on Love :: The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
The Creator Writings
Do you honestly think The Universe would set you adrift with nothing to depend upon? You were given all the tools you need to learn, grow and experience…..all YOU need to do now is remember where they are and how to use them. ~ Creator
transcribed by Jennifer Farley, ThetaHealing Instructor/Practitioner
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Okay. So here's an interesting episode of my latest obsessional therapy, Rawhide. Believe it or not, I am now on series 7 (the Youtube video has expired).
That's what prison life is. So, thanks be for Rawhide, right now.
A little girl who wants looking after and who is, frankly, very insincere to the gorgeous Gil Favor. Of course our story is completely different, but I can see the analogy for sure. Not least, because I am a High Initiate as a Sacred Whore, so the writing is in solid black ink on the wall, as it were.
Divorced men presumably are at the most vulnerable place in relation to their money and thinking that women just want them for that. And I am in such a vulnerable place, that I can only end up asking for help. Sincere or not, I can only lose. Presumably, millionaires are even worse than anyone else. You are money, so it truly hits you where it hurts.
So any notion of care is a thousand times, not allowed. And that as we know is down to you and your blah, blah, blah.
So, the beast that is us is finally tamed. I am sitting under the tree being tortured by thousands of challenges and you are in fear of loss and pre ascension self hatred and lack of confidence. And you find that you still cannot give a shit. The truth of 'not being ready'.
But we love each other. The prophecy was that there would be three horrendous years and then another (or another, who's counting).
The key thing about this episode is that she doesn't love him. She just wants looking after. But your ego presumably believes that of me. And that is where we cannot go past your ego and the situation has to be accepted. Not least because you also still fear/hate my power.
And you are overturning ten thousand or thereabouts male supremacy slavery as we have certainly covered by now.
And I am okay. I have transcended, forgiven The Great Mother, forgiven all this shit and am now in new decisions about how to separate love from life. Until the two converge, when they were written to converge, and not before.
I'm getting a sexy pilot business bag for instance, to wheel around London. And trying to find out if I can get help for the sound proofing or a new flat and all that. I am power and we have tamed the beast that is you and indeed, me.
And my father trained me well. And you have now realised that to love is to actually care about someone else's needs too. At all. That took seven years.
Now it is healing and growing. You into the ascension of the soul and me into my powerful self sufficiency more and more, and indeed, pure, angelic grace, so that I can create myself professionally, despite all these ridiculous obstacles, so that I don't have to RELY on you for redemption but will converge with you instead.
My second ascension is to get out from under the bloody tree. And stop feeling so hurt and enraged. You are what you are. You are for me, whatever you are. I choose you. I always have. And you choose me. When you do.
So, unconditional love and acceptance to the most unreasonable degree. I am a High Initiate. I have no choice. I am what it says on the tin. I am bound to you and in this shit because of you. And you are no longer pure evil. You are a partially cleansed man. That puts you above anyone else anywhere. Other than the top three or four. And yes, you are a god too. Always have been.
That means it's a good day. It's amazing how good one can feel when one drops one's standards low enough.
True love. True Higher Love. The partnership.
A god and The Sacred Disir. The last Queen of Atlantis. Returned.
Natural Born Mystic™
Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™
Peace
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
I know. Me too. I am just looking at it right now in this way. You and I thought we were doing well - well I did:) - because we were moving past co-dependency into inter-dependency. Turns out that that was not good enough either. We are to be completely independent. And together.
The advanced state. Your difficulties, emotional, spiritual and inner, mirror my outer circumstances. And indeed, fears, even though it's more shock and hurt than fear right now and fear is not really an option for someone this far in soul. And the shock and hurt of the circumstances, the irritation actually more than anything. The 'will I be allowed to end this nightmare, sort of thing' the 'will it work and I am just talking about such a tiny step of a new place, etc'.
My discomfort mirrors yours. Grief has turned to melancholy. I failed. But it is a failure that is a future success. That is all we get. 'The once and future king' is Arthur. Ours is 'the once and future life'.
The main thing to see is this; after the war of wars, we give each other comfort again. Even in your dependency of sort of blame and sort of rage at me, you know I have accepted you. That should give you peace.
Now, the next thing for you is easy. See yourself as I see you. Now, and then. Not in between.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Creator Writings
Imagine if you started recognizing your own worth; what would happen, what would that look like to you? The Universe has never created a mistake…….ever. When you indulge in self-depreciation, the only thing you are doing is telling your Inner Self that you are not worthy and deserving of The Universe’s faith in you…..and only for the comfort of others.
There is always a reason to sing your own praises! This is not selfish or conceited, this is SELF LOVE! Appreciate yourself as I do; you are a perfect being created by The Universe to enhance your Earth plane existence. It has to start somewhere….why not with you? ~ Creator
transcribed by Jennifer Farley, ThetaHealing Instructor/Practitioner
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Buddha Style Transcension
Yes. I accept that you are a misogynist. Until you are not. I’m going to get out from under that fucking tree if it’s the last thing I do. I am, yes, a High Initiate. You are a male supremacist who doesn’t want women to work. You objectify women and want them to be what you want them to be. And you hate and neglect them if they are not. I accept. You will be a misogynist and male supremacist and dehumaniser and slaver and financial whoremonger of women. Until you are not.
G’nite.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Long Road To Freedom
Cor, I am soooooo soooo depressed. That’s what anger is. The prevention of that worst of all killers. Depression. I am so depressed.
The best thing we can maintain at this point is pure, pure empathy.
As well as disappointment and some hurt left over and some rage left over and some rejection left over, what I feel more than anything is pure and utter exhaustion. And Long Road To Freedom just about covers it.
Now, empathy. I know, that despite your offensive offences, you are as exhausted as me and that you have been working for Nirvana for as long as me. I am actually too exhausted to say anymore right now.
So let us maintain belligerent empathy now. You and I know that the only thing that makes us happy is each other. So we are both up s**t creek. I know that.
I also know that we are both very independent and achieving human beings who like to do it our way. Let us focus on that truth and try and enjoy and appreciate all that we have achieved individually in our different ways.
And hope. I am looking at the possible truth that, with the new avenues of rescue I am looking at, I might just be able to turn things around in the next three months, so that I can FINALLY have a place to call HOME. A place where I can sit and write and create the material necessary for all that I am. A place, where the torture will finally end. A place where I will get out from under that fucking tree. Now, what if that is true? What if it is true that within the next three months, you begin to get an angle on all that you have learnt so far about yourself, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually and all the rest?
And what if we manage in our way to work together all the way, despite all that is?
Exactly. Resignation, acceptance and then empathy and then hope.
And I am happy for you. Where you are at. Your ego knows it is not some arbitrary monster. Ego is as intelligent as it is stupid. The more intelligent the soul, the more intelligent the ego. The ego backlash is the intelligence of the ego, saying, no, it is not like that and I am not like that and I am not this and I am not that, there is a reason for all that I am and I am going to damn well find my own way of becoming what I would like to be, instead of you telling me what I should be.
Innit. You are allowed to be a Werewolf. Just as I am allowed to be a Valkyrie. You are about to make the journey to find out why and how, in your own way. With my inspiration sure. But with you making the decisions. So that I am not babysitting you anymore, so that I can finally – somehow – create my companies. I am not in a hurry either. They are not exactly small. Any of the three of the art forms. But I am gagging to be able to at least begin. And for that I had to clear so much emotional agony of rejection and pain and dehumanisation and cruelty from you and I still have to create at least one room where I can live.
So, overwhelming is also the word. Be overwhelmed. To ascend out of ego into soul is no mean thing. It is the equivalent of three international art form companies. So, be overwhelmed but don’t be scared. World Ascension does mean something. It means speed within our snail paced life.
Which is why, despite the huge exhaustion, with no possibility of rest or a holiday in sight – 22 – 25 years ago was my last – I am remembering one thing. To be fighting fit is a huge advantage. This is the last push. The last journey. The last leg of the epic odyssey to freedom and happiness that you and I were fated to make.
That is good enough to focus on. Exhausted but fighting fit. And together. That is our miracle. Empathy gives strength. Use it. I will, too. Empathy is the love of love. And we love.
And there’s three months left of decency in this (good and kind to me) country, before it begins again. The winter. That is a good omen if I see one.
Sound proofing/new flat, and/or executive pilot wheelie bag/ipod on all the time, I’s on my way. And so are you.
Tenacity is our greatest gift. And love. We have both.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Synchronicity.......
The Creator Writings
There will be times where your life experience will seem arduous, tiring and downright complicated. Do not despair, my beautiful child! Remind yourself that the tedious moments will pass; (half one's life. AZR) you are loved beyond measure and joy, even though it may be challenging to find, is always present. You are only here for a short time…..make the most of it! ~ Creator
transcribed by Jennifer Farley, ThetaHealing Instructor/Practitioner
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
The Team
Well, it’s debatable for sure. The temptation is to be truly thankful for what we have attained and what we have been blessed with and what we have worked so hard for. I can see as I am beginning in this phenomenal state of grace, to look back and see what you have been struggling with now and how hurt you of course have been from your first marriage and all that has been your life and to truly embrace empathy, if you see what I mean, I can see by looking at all that that we always have a choice and a dilemma. How much to keep working on separately and how much to keep working on to be together.
Of course, it is all too soon and we are not talking about today and despite the fact that I am to continue living in such conditions and you are to continue living without me and me you, and you are to continue to feel inadequate or afraid or just not purified enough or confident enough or this enough or that enough, sure, the question is complex.
What are we waiting for?
Or what are we being asked to wait for?
Fate and destiny. Who chooses. Who chooses what and what chooses whom?
In other words, how much of our arduous new journeys – you to find confidence, consideration and indeed, to develop your creative and artistic selves – me to become the three art forms in professional form and to become a strong entrepreneur – have to be done separately.
In theory, we should be friends. In theory, that is what the whole epic of odyssey has been about. To turn our parents marriages and our first ‘marriages’ and marriages into the advanced state of togetherness, friendship and dominant and submissive perfection.
So, just bear that in mind. Don’t drop off the radar just because of fear. Keep working at it. Don’t fall into resignation in other words, as I am trying not to too.
I am very pleased however that I am not taking you for granted, that I am not presuming that you want to provide for me. I think that is not only great transcension but average decency. I am pleased that you are beginning to accept that I have needs too and that I am not your past experiences and that the love and the like you have for is the pure form you discovered seven years ago. I am pleased that you are beginning to love and trust me and know that I love and adore you. I am pleased that you are beginning to trust the friendship and the mothering I indeed, want to give you and I am pleased that I am beginning to trust that you may just want to father me after all, and be the best friend I felt you were right from the beginning. In the most carnal, creative, platonic, objective, subjective way possible.
We are doing well. Just don’t drop off now, thinking that the comfort zone is where we should stay. Why should we stay there? Why do we have to move so slow? Why do we have to suffer in silence, when our love energy blows both of us out of the water and energises and empowers us beyond anything else? Fear.
Don’t be afraid. I won’t. Let’s see how it goes, but think about that comfort zone. You are not a Unicorn Killer anymore. You are a man. A god.
And you love women. You love me. And you like me too.
And look at this way. Not to judge or pressurise you anymore. I am under the tree quite gracefully. My work is for both of us. As it is for anyone who wants to grow power, creativity, Spirit and confidence. So I suppose the rest is humility and partnership. It is also trusting yourself that you won’t be tempted to become co-dependent. I just about trust myself now in terms of emotional co-dependency. The aim is to be ourselves while being together right?
I think we could be almost there. And if you recall our first conversation, you expected me to take the piss out of you creatively. You found that I don’t do that. And I am not ego ridden at all about being a novice entrepreneur. I want to learn all I can and I don’t want you to hold my hand, just because I want you to. In other words, the ability to stand on our own two feet alongside each other, while learning from and inhaling each other is extremely strong now.
That is the turning point. Forgiveness, trust and knowing one is oneself, even with the person and energy you want to be swallowed whole by. Inter dependence.
Otherwise we work on a state even more than that. Painful as it is. Whichever. But we should not hold back out of fear. The comfort zone is not to be stayed in. it is to be used, simply, as a temporary threshold. In other words, maybe we can move fast, if we want to.
No more taking for granted either way. Just pure, true love. The spiritual friendship to go with the SEX. Nice.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
The Team Pt ll. The Slow Resurrection
Don’t worry about it. It’s nice to be humbled. I am both the Anuncier and me, so I am in perfect alignment with what is coming out and totally in tune with what I want from it too and am able to decipher the journey both for you and for myself and how together or separate it is, if you see what I mean.
I have fear of loss now of course, but why wouldn’t I. You are your own man and no one wants to be manipulated and no one wants to be shredded by an Anuncier. It was my privilege and job and burden to deliver it all. There is no point in me being terrified anymore. We have gone beyond that.
You need time. You are hurt and confused and you feel disrespected and violated and raped. Basically. And not just by me. By the rejections of past too and with everything really. Ascension covers everything.
And talking of rape in general, by the way, and this a by the way, men rape women, because men feel raped. That was the revelation recently. Men rape women in war, because they are being raped by war.
That obviously applies to all that is in the home too and with us too, even though I know you have gone past that rage and violence now. I know you are moving it all into a tidal wave of love now and I will maintain that certainty as you go through your final stages of decision and purification and back into love and therefore, love for me.
In tune with that, my life is also primarily about alchemy now too. You are in alchemy. And so am I. I am traipsing around London and still not getting much done. But doing lots of emotional work, lots of taking it all in, lots of looking back and healing, healing and healing.
Feeling good and then emotional and then good. Very individual, basically. And very close to you. I am growing into the entrepreneurial woman, the writer, the philosopher, the this, the that and primarily the woman who loves her man. I don’t need to do much work, so have no intention of doing so. This is our time. Our time of healing. Our time of growing. Our time of mutual alchemy. Our time of everything.
The time you need is good for me too. To tame this beast of a Valkyrie Warlord who had to galvanise into action. It’s lovely to return to the person you knew four years ago, the person who loved you for three years with pure angel patience and understanding. That’s the real me. It’s nice to have her back, for me, let alone for you too.
We are both healing the broken heart. And we are doing it together. That is beyond a miracle. We are beyond a miracle. I will trust, leaving the choice to you. But I will never leave you. You need to know that. I never did.
But you need to feel secure. You need to feel love. My love. I can give you that now. If it takes weeks, months or longer, for you to heal and recover from the full force of Amera Ziganii Rao Sacred Disir shredding, then it doesn’t matter. This is our time. Our time, forever.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
(Both the woman, and the Anuncier. In alignment)
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
The Team Pt lll. The Slow Resurrection
And yes, my sweet. I am nothing like her. She is your archetype. I had to adopt the Valkyrie. She was the other kind of woman. The one who marries for business, sort of thing. With due respect. Business, children. She was sort of like you. Not me.
I love you. I always have. I had to integrate the warlord to fight you. To become the Anuncier, just as I had to with the world, before I met you. Glad, though, despite the fears, the fear of losing you, because now I can face the whole entire world as an earthed Atlantean. I know every evil of the world. I can define it all for everyone. I most certainly know the enemy. But I also understand. I have defined the pain. And can help.
But no, I am not like her. I am like one of your young ones. You know which one.
Remember who I am. And talking of hers....HER.....well.....you're just hurt. Remember who I am.
Despite your pain, you should be glad too. You are no longer a misogynist and you don't hurt women any more. You also are beginning to remember who you are. Be glad. And you are loved. Be glad. Be you.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
The Team Pt lV. The Slow Resurrection
....and it has to be said in the new context, that The Other was a friend. You are the one I love and you are the one I have always loved. He knows that and you know that.
This is all about you. And no one else. It was a complex plan to push me into more mirrored confidence about an ex chattel career self. Whether I ever do any professional acting or not. The third art form so far is design. But we'll see and that is not the point. It was a mirror. He was a mirror in just the arena you were battling with, even though he battled with it too. The mirror was also for you. It's amazing what mirrors can do. They bring out different parts of us, that we have long lost confidence in because we are too close to them and the people involved.
And then he got so much out of it too. As your friends have along the way too. Don't ever doubt. I did because of so many reasons, namely the complex and obtuse prophecies that I was meant to labour over in true Hierophant skill training. As well as the guidance driving me this way and that as and when. To push us all along. Painful but true.
Fear of loss. On all fronts. Throw it out. It is no longer appropriate. Even though I am scared of losing you. Because of you. And nothing else.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Marriage
Well, now it really is like Steven Shainberg's Secretary isn't it....I feel suitably hysterical and anxious. And I sense you do too.
Are you going to come for me, do you love me, is this real, am I mad, maybe he never wants to love me, maybe it's all for nothing, all the wonderfully excruciating anxieties of love. They are all here. And I am trying to appreciate the real of it and trust that you finally get the reins of this thing and I finally get to be a woman, and wait and freak out.
Just being right now, trying to hold onto the philosophy, to centre me...today is about the revelation that love is the journey to enlightenment across the board. Buddha finally sees the dark and the light as the perfection of The Universe, and when we look at how society regards 'love', what an unspiritual world. This is the seat of spirituality. Not 'marriage' but marriage.
The whole agonising courtship journey we have made.
But that's the philosophy to keep me centred. I will just continue to freak out and try and enjoy it. I am truly sitting on that chair in Secretary, waiting to be redeemed. And I am going to try and like it and love it, as I wake up every day from now on and look forward to either you, or the four walls.
This is a time of belief, intention and manifestation for me, and lots of action from you. I like that. I like you. Our time is here. If you want it, if you are courageous enough to do it and if you are truly moved to do it. And if you can get past your own hysteria and anxiety too.
Let's be anxious together. Let's enjoy the word, thrilling for the first time. The centred thrill of peace. And joy.
Yours in anxiety, hope and agony, hysteria and excitement, in this most public way. Yours forever. Yours since the beginning of time.
Amera
x
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....and I add a very important factor to that. It is not just me who has had to integrate both the dark and the light as The Universe. It is you. Your forgiveness is needed now, paradoxically for the same thing. You come from the dark but you are the light. I come from the light but am the dark and the light. And so on. It is the all, that we all are. It is forgiveness across the board. The Dom and the sub. The sub and the Dom. The dance. True higher life. True higher love. The scene in Guns of Navarone when the spy is killed is perfect for me. The moral dilemma versus the need to get the job done. David Niven's and Gregory Peck's characters in that scene say it all. This is also a perfect scene for us. Sums up the whole thing.
I remain anxious, in the chair and loving. And appropriately hysterical and calm.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2_5ayprT6LM&index=63&list=LLlhyE8aC8Nf8xFX6OeMNNTw
....I've also just realised something chilling and Divine, too. It was July 2010. When my career 'got in the way' so dramatically and drastically and all the rest. July 2010. Four years. Exactly.
I remain, in hope and hysteria. And great love. I am off to traipse. 'The Secret Doctrine' (Blavatsky) tucked under my arm. And as they say, 'a song in my heart'.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....other than this, my sweet....Sacred Slut Intellectual™
A nice, new development from Sacred Whore. Slut Intellectual.
The Sacred Pimp™ and the Sacred Slut Intellectual™
or...to roll of the tongue....Sacred Pimps™ and Slut Intellectuals™
You can carry the sacred too. You deserve it.
The Return to Lemuria + The Return to Atlantis. The truth of this world. The real, ancient, modern world. Us.
Nice, nice, nice. New vernacular. Flowing.
In the mobile chair now. Waiting and anxious and excited. I like 'dying' for what I believe. I like 'dying' for you.
Peace
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Your Friend
Yes. I understand.
I have a new routine now. Crying, crying and crying. Eating junk food and watching films all over again. My sort of comfort holiday for now, while I wait to see what you do. I am crying because it is the only way to live in this flat now. And the only way to remain under the tree. And the only way to cope with the hurt, even though I do understand. I hate it but I understand. And you fought so hard for me last year, with The Other.
You are deciding what to do and I have to have faith still that you do love me and that you do want to be with me and that you have been growing, despite your hate and fear of me and your condemnation because I took Warlord too far for you and reminded you of your first wife, and indeed because I have enforced such degrees of female vocation on you and indeed, spiritual vocation on both of us.
I understand. And I cry. It's the best way to cope. And I wait. In the chair, as is my destiny. And I dream of male love. All illusions of romance have clearly been ripped out of me. But I wait to see what your resurrection can bring. And pray that it will bring something. It's all been a process. Now, it's your friend or me. I pray your decision will be me and that it will not take too long.
Meanwhile, I will still get the executive bag and try to find somewhere to escape from this place and work. I have to maintain my sanity during this most awful period of my life that I could ever have imagined. And just stay strong and see where it ends.
And I meanwhile, healthily, cry.
But yes, reluctantly, I do understand.
And I miss you.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
No Show Again
Okay. So, not tonight.
So, to be fair to you, the chair scenario, my willingness to do it or not, is not personal. You have a good and comfortable life. I do not. So, sometimes, I can do the chair, other times I cannot.
And you have to bear in mind, that I am living a very tough life and one that makes me feel suicidal every second day. So my moods are not personal. They are of my life. You, it seems are just exploring love. I am trying to reclaim my life from hell. There's a difference. And reflected in the non urgency of your non communication.
So. I don’t want to take your love for granted, your care for granted, your contact for granted, or your providing for granted. Despite all that has been prophecied, you may never want to be with me. I accept that now.
So, I would say it is friendship really that we are after now. You don’t want me, care for me, care about me, blah, blah, blah, other than as a permanent, it seems, idea. That is a great deal I suppose and shouldn’t be scoffed at.
In other words, either our destiny and journey is to try and converge, through the chair/Secretary film plot, or it is to go on in alignment and separately, forever until we converge at some point down the road.
At any given time. This is not easy to do.
You have everything and give nothing. I have nothing and give everything. That is not easy to do either.
So, just reassessing, but I am fine. Still crying it out and that’s not meant for melodrama. It is real, but I was not trying to evoke false sympathy through saying it.
Crying is good. So is feeling the sheer frustration of getting the raw end of the deal. To be Her daughter is a pile of crap basically and to be a High Initiate is a pile of crap too. No matter. That’s my problem and I am doing bloody well.
So, friendship, with a view to you maybe getting in touch for the first time in seven years, at some point in our lives.
Let’s just leave it at that for now.
I am making new decisions again. Going to end these late nights. These flats are like a morgue and I am going out of my mind with my usual nocturnal hours. They began because of my disability and because I think, psychically, I live your hours. I am going to change that now and be out there and awake during day hours, even though this flat most definitely has challenges during those hours too. But then I can go out to more office type places to work. So, just focusing on things like that right now. That's not running away, I don't think. That is survival, so I can survive the worst time of my life.
I don’t want to be a burden or enforced love on anyone. But we are doing well I guess. I just wish you would get in touch. But you won’t, until you do and unless you do. So, not going to ask anything of you, until you wish to give it or not. The voyeuristic gene I suppose. You are what you are. I accept.
Friends.
With my love for you. And your sort of love, for me. And on any given day, either I am asked to focus on us and be the woman in the chair, and show my devotion and undying love, despite all your isolation and voyeurism, or I am asked to be completely independent in my prison life and my rags to riches life, and do my own thing and leave you to it. That is our routine I guess and one I wanted to articulate formally.
G’nite
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
...but I have to tell you one thing that is long, long overdue.
Loving you has been an unmitigated nightmare. Loving you is a nightmare. I would rather have no one than someone who just doesn't care. And worse, someone who just cannot relate. How can you relate to my pathetic life?
And why do I have to tell you every single second of empathy work along the way?
A nightmare. A complete and utter nightmare. Every single family relationship of my life. I would like to think you are different. You still have not got in touch. I am still asked to give to you all the time and you still do not care.
I must be mad. But no, my psychic powers are too real. Therefore, you are just a nightmare. And I wish I knew what I could do about it.
At the moment, I hate it all.
And I will find out what I can do about it. There has to be a solution. I hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it, hate it all.
And you still have not got in touch. Another day. Another viewing. And still no contact. A nightmare.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Your Beast Still Being Very Much Alive
So. The past four years have been for one thing and one thing alone. To show you and men and your people how, despite all your protestations and shows of love, you do not love anything or anyone.
Your idea of love is barren voyeurism. And torture.
We now know that.
I am not sure if you are aware of this, but your unconscious drive is that I finally give up my careers and agree that love is a woman without careers who is there just for you. I am aware now, that you are not aware of that.
I was chosen for this task, because I am not a gold digger. Never have been, never will be. My life was taken over 17 years ago, to find out who can give and why anyone wants to give and more importantly, who does not give and who does not want to give at all. And I am talking about love, let alone anything else.
This disability took me into annals of vulnerability that have only tested this.
The answer is no one other than my own people. The people of The Temple. The humanitarians of this world.
Your idea of love is barren voyeurism and basically, you just do not want to love and you most certainly do not want to love me. Your idea of love is torture. Barren, long distance, withholding torture.
Don't love me. Love me. That is your journey now. If you truly are my destiny, as in a real non barren relationship and communication partnership, so be it. That is up to you and The Universe.
My journey is to remember who I am and all that I achieved, before I met you and had to go up against all that is the non love of this world.
The Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity that I achieved and that I can share with those who want to hear. The ten years work I did on myself before I met you and before it was all to be tested.
I am listening to Anthony Robbins right now. He is reminding me that to change one's state (out of agony and anger and pain) is to ask the right questions. I see you as having given me two things; first, that you compliment my work like no one else, because you have shown me how good I am. Second, that I am beautiful.
That's it. And a lot. Other than that, you have stolen from, used and raped me for seven years, without giving anything of yourself. You are a barren, voyeuristic torturer and I dishonour you completely.
This story is not about females who shouldn't ask men to look after them. This story is about your unwillingness to love anyone else, other than those who will be enslaved. This is still about your immense non love. Your fascism of hatred. You just don't want to love me. You want me to be your slave. Or nothing at all. And I am not even sure you want that. I just think you hate me like all before you and I have to leave you with that. Hate me. Join the long queue behind me. I love me. Thank you very much. Goodbye. At least, no one has to come next. Just hate me. Everyone else of your kind does too. You can only hate.
You can deal with that. I am going back to my notes from 17 years ago now and, like Henry Miller in a hovel in Paris, having been emotionally raped by his mad wife, June, I am going to romanticise all that I am being forced to endure and believe me, I will.
My rags to riches life begins. You can do what you want. You can voyeur and torture yourself. I am no longer in your cage. I do not belong to you. And I am most certainly, not spoken for. I am alone. I am me. And I am great. No one is going to torture me anymore. I am busy. At work. I got myself to where I am in life. I will do it all. I always have. You can do what you want. And give nothing, just as you always have. You can just do it alone. Without me. But hey, enjoy my work. You don't want to provide anything. I have provided everything for four years. I am most definitely done.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
......And not that you deserve this, but know this. You are the only one I liked. I just like you. Which is why it has been so hard to give up your friendship. Such as it is. I just liked you. I like your mind. I like you. You are the only family I ever liked.
But you don't love me, just like everyone else. Don't. I give up your like. And I give up liking you. I will miss that.
I've lost the only friend I really ever had. Because you don't love me any more than any one else has done. Sad but true. Torture and voyeurism are not love. That's all that men have ever done to me anyway. But I cannot take it from you any more. I have endured it long enough.
Maybe you will love, one day. Maybe, you won't. But I accept that you have never loved me. I accept that you do not want to be with me. I accept that you do not love me.
I will miss your friendship. I always did.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Your Rejection. Your Problem
And I am going to remember one very important, crucial thing, in your rejection. There is a big difference between enforced slavery and so called maternal.
I know what I am and yet I have been vilified by men, and women of your archetype my whole life, for apparently not being what I do more than most people on earth.
The website is that proof. All my writing for four years, is that proof. All my care, my attention, my taking on your psyche, everything. I gave like no other woman has ever given to you. You like slaves. You do not like maternal women. I will remember that crucial difference as I maintain massive self worth in the face of your mad rejection. Men are mad. Not me.
The most awful thing though is that men want to remain mad. You will. Believe me. You will, however not make women feel cruel or non maternal, because you reject them. Maternal is not slavery. Maternal is maternal. I know the difference. You don't.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
Your Rejection. Your Problem Pt ll
And don't forget that this is your SICKNESS.
And that is what causes me real agony today. It doesn't even matter than I am no longer sick. That I healed my dependency five years ago. That is agonisingly painful. You still don't see me at all.
That is soul destroying. Dependency of belief that women have to be obsequious slaves to be maternal is your sickness dependency. That is your selfishness in life and in the world as you and as a people.
And as I see what I had to do for seven years and then for four and then for three, I can see the beauty of having done it. I did doubt myself seven years ago and was specifically thinking of my brother who has always looked at me the way you do.
You are so sick. That is your sickness and it destroys the world and women like me. But no longer, me. My heart breaks that I healed myself so far, and yet, you have still rejected me for the same reason as the man before you rejected me eight years ago.
There is truly no hope. And therefore the only peace for a seer or a woman, is to be completely alone. I cannot deal with your sickness anymore. Maternal is not slavery. Maternal is maternal. Maybe you will not know that until you next life.
I will no longer ever have any hope that you will heal that in time for me. You make me feel so alone. Because I am. You do not see me for one second. You see nothing. You are sick. And it is so destructive for those around you.
And I just have to feel the pain of being so fast. I healed a long time ago. And I am still alone.
What a tragedy earth is. What a complete and utter tragedy. And I am sorry to say, but you are so bloody slow. I don't know why I have been tortured by the promise of a destiny with a man. I let it go completely today. You are just too slow. You still believe what you are, is true. That is so damn slow.
Farewell, my sick, psycho twin soul. Maternal was never slavery. Maternal is me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
The Personal Story
No. To be healing a man who is involved in a sexless and unhappy marriage is one thing. To be enslaved in a torture chamber, as this flat is, and to be giving valuable self determination time to a man who is not only fucking another woman, but also giving himself to her in a way he can only voyeur the healer, is foolish madness.
I am too hurt and too proud. The compassion is that I have told you that it is sickness once again. Your psychosis. I could have just left it, but made sure I told you what it is.
For three years, I have been struggling as a polished Alchemist, to understand what the fuck this flat was about. Now I know. It was to torture me so much that I step away from you. To find out that you have turned away even after your divorce to another female is too much. And mostly, because of the reason that you have done it. You may tell yourself that it is because I am too strong, or too powerful, or this or that, as men and women of your type do. It is not. It is because you are like my brother. And my mother. Stuck in that relentless and terrible psychosis of Mother Psychosis™. As I have defined again and again. The Homicidal Selfishness™. You can be.
But you will not vilify me for it by either being the torture voyeur, or by fucking another woman and giving yourself to her just in your presence, when you have distanced yourself with such madness and cruelty from me for so long.
This is it. The departure. I am now self sufficiency and as one of the Christopher Nolan Batman films quotes, ‘make the climb’. I am making the climb now in the most ridiculously difficult and challenging circumstances because you are sick and because of no other reason. I have defined the politics and the psychology of that sickness for you with blood, sweat and tears and the relentless attacks by you. I have had enough and not before time, but obviously, it was not going to be allowed until this time.
Now, it is your journey. Do you have what it takes to heal yourself of that psychosis as I did of mine? I don’t know. That is up to you and The Universe and your final test. Mine is to self determine my life into business and out of this life now. So that I can be safe and sound at last and not the victim of your terrible injustice and power of abuse.
I sacrificed myself to see the whole. I did it and I am still alive. I am more maternal than you even know how to conceive of it. And I am as vilified today by you as I was by my brother at 11. This is your psychosis and not mine. Instead of projecting it onto other women, and trying that ego pattern of just trying to find someone new to try with, you have to confront the sickness. You don’t even know you are sick. And this is four years after I began your treatment.
You are not a worthy patient anymore. And I have to accept that you are just a client now. Too slow for me to even contemplate the partnership in any shape or form. I am alone and I accept that. I am gifted and I accept that. I am a Carl Jung, Anthony Robbins and all the rest. I accept that. And I am alone. Because you are still sick and you don’t even know it yet. You have to acknowledge it and acknowledge it REGULARLY and EFFECTIVELY. You just fuck other women instead. You are not worthy. And I am off.
Maybe we will meet again. Maybe we won’t. But I will not be tortured or hated or abused by you anymore. I left my mother, and all of them for the same reason. I told you that four years ago and my faith in your healing was practically non existent, even then. Now, it is tenuous but also strong. I know The Universe.
You, apparently, will be forced at some point. When, who the fuck knows. So, do what you want. But to know that a man doesn’t want to give, say hello, god forbid, provide, care at all, or give a shit about you, is enough to push me away.
You have succeeded. I am pushed. I am gone.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Beast Is Tamed. Amera Ziganii Rao
'Donald Draper' can go fuck himself. Amera Ziganii Rao has left the building.
Amera Ziganii Rao ♧ 2014
The Superhuman Is Risen. Amera Ziganii Rao
So, the post script. Just to finish off this particular story. I have a destiny to do with a man. He is a man who is to apparently, love me one day. I have now ‘let him go’ after a seven year journey of motherhood, because he is still not capable of caring for the woman he claims to sort of love.
This journey has taught me many, many, many things. I have been writing about this subject and exploring it, both as a woman and as an Esoteric for 17 years, ever since I retired from professional life. In normal speak, I sort of had a breakdown and couldn’t function anymore without going deep into myself to find out why I had such emotional pain in life. I also was committed to transferring my able but under achieving skills from a career in news journalism into opinion led literature. I began to study to be a writer, at home, while planning to do part time jobs and live of my short lived redundancy. Two years later, I was crippled through a largely invisible, but very debilitating deformity that is being re-habilitated through medical treatment. I entered the world of pain, pain, pain and pain and more than that, vulnerability with other human beings.
I also seemed to have the obsessional drive to find love. This is a drive I knew I had at the age of eight. I was a self confessed love addict and love dependent and had already been working very intelligently and arduously to find out what it was all about. It turned out, to be, in a nutshell, a dire lack of self love, from having come from great cruelty and madness from my family. It then turned out that this is a madness that is so common that it is utterly and profoundly terrifying and fantastically necessary for everyone to know.
That is the two second outline of my background. I am now going back into my archives of writing, from 17 years ago, to start reading all that I have written so far. At that ignorant time, I called it journal writing. What it actually is, as I look at it now in renewed hope and self satisfaction, is massive, consistent, brilliant, consciousness growing work. I am a machine of consciousness. A self confessed, as anyone who has read my website knows, Hierophant. I am many things I did not know I was. People called it wisdom, great insight and intellectual. Yes. I am all those things and it is all those things, but what I have plucked out of The Universe, with my twin soul’s mind as a muse for me too, on a profoundly psychic level, is extraordinary.
Extraordinary because the agenda of the world has wiped it out.
Love, whether it is romantic, partnership or family, or friendships has been turned into some shallow and silly pastime. Love it seems, even to a former cerebral intellectual hard line professional woman like me who worshiped all things in her that were male and macho, is the central anchor of all our consciousness, our spiritual centred becoming and more than anything else, our POWER. The power of alchemy, the art of transforming any pain into success, any pain into pleasure, any hardship into success, any negative into a positive is accessible, to the highest minds on earth. The alchemical mind is the mind of consciousness.
Now, as I begin to look back over this writing that just poured out, because as Anthony Robbins says, I asked the right questions and I made the best of 17 years of incapacity, a modern monk lifestyle, I can see the skill and talent that I am. I am a huge analyst but I analyse emotion and feelings. I also deliver from The Universe. It is a ‘noetic’ exploration, I was just looking at yesterday. There are all sorts of philosophical interpretations for all that I am and all that I do, and all that anyone can do, if they are incapacitated for 17 years and become a monk and were born with the gift of Hierophant.
This is the truth of the higher mind. I have always been told that I am extremely good at making high thought and high feeling, relevant to the ordinary world and the world of action and ordinary and every day emotion. I would hope so. This is what I am hoping to turn into a large educational system to be able to help people both feel good about themselves, but also access The Universe and therefore their own immense spiritual power.
And indeed, finally, love. So, I am okay. But devastated. I am now a divorcee, effectively, after having had a non marriage. I can’t say it has been a nothing experience for one second, but the truth is that esoteric or not, genius or not, er real and not ‘just’ psychic, married or not married, I have been battered by a man for seven years. Apparently, that is the love experience, part one.
He finds that he cannot care. He finds that despite my renowned maternal greatness and leadership of maternal drive, I am just ‘the lad’ category that he defined me as when he first started thinking about women.
He finds that he has a million reasons why he does not want to be with me and why he does not want to love me. And he finds that he can only hate me. And that women should be hated, unless they are ‘not challenging’ or they are ‘nice’.
In other words, despite 32 years of exploring men and relationship, I am now reeling from the same experience I had at 19. Men are simply, mad. Now, to complicate things further, there are two archetypes.
So, after having had a terrible experience with my mother, his archetype, I then had to have a terrible experience with him.
So, the first question should be, so why even bother? Indeed.
I am no longer bothering for one second. I have apparently done my work and learned all that I am to learn.
The complication is that apparently he is still my destiny. Why, I should care for one second, that he is, is beyond me, but I am run and led by a higher power, I would add here that I serve The Highest Power. The Great Mother, The Triple Goddess, The Universe, The All.
I am a Hierophant and Disir. I am a High Serpent Priesthood Priestess. I was to purify his soul and recruit him to serve The Great Mother in the work I will be doing on earth and am already doing, hopefully, to help people with their human rights and relationship rights.
It seems that I have failed.
Apparently, this was just stage one.
So, as a divorcee, I am now stepping away from this story and ‘letting him go’. My own life is a disaster right now and he doesn’t care one bit. He finds that now, when I need him most, he loves me the least. In fact, he would be quite happy if I sat here in the mire that is my present life and keep giving consciousness help to him all the way. Men and women of that archetype are quite extraordinary in their madness and self serving agenda. Selfishness does not even begin to describe who they are. They are the dark of this world and I had to find out in minute detail by entering the dynamic fully and wholly and being spat out at the other end.
Esoteric Master or not, I have lived the typical female (my archetype) journey and selflessly given everything emotionally to a quest and followed my intuition all the way. In other words, I was supposed to be ‘raped’ the whole way. Not to credit evil for one second. To credit the sacrifice and death of true love. To show the dying for love journey.
He and his whole archetype, male or female believe that love is slavery. I and my archetype believe that love is love. Two people caring for each other. There is no bridge and no compromise between the two archetypes now as it was, seven years ago. I have been totally ‘raped’ and now know the full truth. And I soar with the power that I have attained through it. Not to credit evil. To credit love. He is evil. I am love. They are evil. I am love.
So, my first thoughts are that my new decision is that, despite my very real intuition that tells me that he is still my destiny, I declare today, that I am no longer going to care. To continue to care about a person who gives you nothing, while you wait for him while not waiting for him is as demoralising and disempowering as actually sitting and waiting for the person and doing nothing else.
I therefore let him go completely today. I love him but he doesn’t love me. No one I have ever called family has been able to love me with any care or consideration or regard for my humanity for one second. Sure, there has been love, but it is an inconsistent and fascistic kind. If you don’t give to them all the time with total self sacrifice, you apparently are not worthy of even being spat on, let alone anything else. My life was to experience vulnerabilities across the board to find out that the world is of evil. His evil, their evil and their whole non Temple evil that runs this world. The world of madness, cruelty and self serving fascism.
The world of pre true love.
In other words, the ordinary world.
The great news is that I have been ‘held’ as I have evolved further and further into total departure and self sufficiency. That is how he loves. Psychically and as a voyeur, so that he gives nothing while giving what he wants.
Now, I am grown. I am also devastated, but he doesn’t care about that. Apparently, this is the not feeling of his people. That is a lie. That is not feeling. That is hatred and rage. Men and women of that archetype and the men and women of my archetype too, who are not Initiates, who are not spiritually evolved, and who are not of The Temple, are all mother psychotics. They demand motherhood to the cost of all. And if you don’t give it to them, they will kill you dead.
In other words, despite all the smiles and politeness and attempts, the world is run by Homicidal Fascism and abject, psychopathic cruelty. The normal world calls this being a dominant. The world is just, simply, cruel and my destiny was to have some of the most extreme cruel people known on earth.
So, that’s me. I am flying with power, flying with my own self worth and flying with my talent now. And I am now to stand completely alone, psychically, emotionally and above all, love wise, so that I can finally build a life worth living. And I will decide if and when he ever comes back, if I will even look at him. I don’t see any reason to love him now. We will see if he is worth anything at all.
But for now, he remains a cruel and evil child of hate. And is simply, shockingly, psychopathic about his so called love for women and certainly for me. I died for love basically and I am now to resurrect. Alone.
I am actually not saying much here. I am taking time out now, both to change my life and also to start working on the solid and overview material of 17 years of consciousness work and development. Reading my journals is the best thing I could be doing now, because if I think I am good now, wow, I was already good then. The difference with consciousness is that a Master, which is what I am now, becomes conscious to extreme levels. In other words, I know what is going on everywhere with everything and understand everything. Grand statements for a grand dame. Me.
And if the self pumping sounds extreme I apologise. To have been raped solid by a man for seven years should have stripped me of self worth. I am fighting back as you can see and as I have learned, the whole world joins him in trying to make me disappear and hate myself. That is not going to happen and I am only going to thrive more with disaster. An alchemist or an alchemist in training as I hope many of you are, has to turn round shit. I now face my biggest challenge. To be heart broken, emotionally raped and hated actively by the person you love, is not easy. To have to turn around a life with that is even harder.
The sacrifice is him. I reject him today. I plan to reject him forever. And I fly in the face of destiny. Why should I love him, is the question. Again, I may be an Esoteric Master but I am a consistently improving Alchemist and Alchemist in training. I say no to him, no to my destiny with him and no to evil. He was given the chance to serve. He refused. And now, so do I. I will never serve love again, with a man. They are truly, not worth it.
I’ll be back. Back with my professional (paying) work. So, continue to enjoy my professional (non paying) work here. It has been my pleasure and pain. And I hope you learn and become empowered by it and learn that the greatest thing about love is that it is finally out of your system. Love cannot change you anymore, once you have been emotionally raped for seven years or however long your destiny is. Love and relationship finally have no power over you. Because care is the only thing that’s worth it in the end. And care is as absent today as it was seven years ago. And the reason is that they are mad. Simply, utterly, off the planet, bonkers, mad. Not bad. Mad. And madness of that kind is bad. It’s evil. We love evil because evil and love is the dynamic on earth. We are love. They are not. We love evil. And one day we do not. Then, we live. Then, life loves us. And then, we fly.
What an extraordinary and awful journey life is though before that. And always hard to remember. The devastation will stay with me forever. But the empowerment will only soar. Evil has to be defeated. The tragedy is that evil is our family. Evil is the person we love. Evil is cruelty. Evil is psychopath. Evil is self serving fascism. Evil is the all that is ugly. And evil will never love. Evil is evil. And my twin soul is evil. And evil can only win. Evil beat me. But I no longer wait for evil. And in that is my only win. Alchemising all the abuse. And walking away forever, from evil. Fuck destiny. Where’s my life?
That is the only question worth asking. Where is my life? Oh, I loved. Right, where is MY life and how do I create it?
Fuck destiny. And fuck him. I want quality of life. I want a new destiny. And I don't want him any more. Or any part of him any more. Relationship is truly a waste of time. Destiny has to be walked away from in the end. Decisions have to be made. That is our free will. And I choose me. Forever, me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Defining The Superhuman. Amera Ziganii Rao
Goddesses/gods and mortals. Now I understand. And I agree. Good and evil. Goddesses/gods and mortals.
The non Temple population of this world are not gods and can never be or become gods. Their challenge is to become human. The challenge for goddesses and gods, is to increase and escalate their Divinity, in the face of relentless persecution, JEALOUSY and hatred. We are the healers on this planet. The human rights warriors, the women and men who are abused and the greatest carriers of wisdom this planet could ever see. We are The Temple. The goddesses and gods.
We are the 'martyrs'. The ones who die for love, who die for life and who are hated, much more than they are loved. The others will never be gods or goddesses. That's the jealousy, hatred and vilification. The lack of support, the lack of care and the lack.
We learn many things from them. One was my mother, one was my father, one was my brother, one was my first spiritual teacher, one was a long term friend, etc. And one is my twin soul. The others are every man I have ever known and tried to be with.
The Ascension therefore for a non Divine human being - The Temple healers, the Atlanteans are THE DIVINE SOUL and are Divine souls - is not necessarily a change in any spiritual DNA.
Their Ascension is to accept OUR Divinity.
Jealousy of females indeed. Our Uber Ascension, our martyrdom, our prison sentences, our dying for love and life, is to BECOME OUR Divinity. Having been born with it.
They are human, the non Temple, including my twin soul, if they ascend out of EVIL and MADNESS.
Then they finally house and protect and are WORTHY of loving the Divine souls, the High Priestesses and Priests of this earth.
Then they finally purify evil.
The Ascension of the non Temple mortal is to purify evil. The Ascension of the superhumans, the goddesses and gods, the high priestesses and priests is to become healer warriors and to die for love and life and to actually change their spiritual DNA.
We are the Divine mind and the Divine heart. Mortals can never enter that. They can only honour it. That is their Ascension.
I ain't seen one yet.
He has to accept MY Divinity. No wonder he has locked me up and thrown away the key. Compassion for the mortals? It used to be there. Now, it is not. Forgiveness, if he or they ever find humanity? Yes, but not with that kind of compassion again. Mortals can never be trusted as goddesses and gods. We are the Divine Soul.
He never will be, as will none of them. The jealousy comes from them. The rage, the inhumanity, the vilification, the madness and the pain. Our job is to heal them. To die for love. To die for HER.
This earth has to change. We are the Divine Soul.
They and he are not. He has to accept my Divinity. Then, he will love. Or not.
Martyrdom and the dying journey certainly therefore gives one thing. Self discovery. No one can ever take that away again.
Goddesses and mortals indeed. Not just a shaving your legs advert. Very very real.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
You bought the Sacred Whore like a piece of meat and you called that a wife. Your trophy wives. Your dancing girls. Your chattel and serving girls. Your piece of beauty. You bought us like you would cattle. Then you called it wives. Now you call it prostitution. The High Priestesses of the real God. You bought us to buy God, The Mother, The Universe and you caged us, separated us from our Divine gifts and skills in the Temple and drove us mad and then lost interest in us, because we had no gifts left, no excitement, no hunter in ourselves and no hope or joy left. Then you just called us mad and discarded us. You called us evil and you call love obedience, even though it had already killed us. You moved into our Temples and you played with the divination tools and thought you communed. The destruction of Atlantis was your gift.
You stole us from God, The Mother, The Universe and you tried to usurp us. You vilified us, enslaved us and you still envy us today. You call it intuition. You might want to think about this when you hate us out of your jealousy. The mystic gene means physical tortuous pain and taking on the empathy of the human race. All their pains, evils and dark thoughts. We see and feel everything. We make crucial sacrifices to be near Spirit and the unseen and we go without for years. To be shaman is not glamour. I make it glamour. To be shaman is a specific Samurai existence, ascetic and harsh. We commune to be guides. And you take that and you shame yourselves because you just want the meat. You didn’t just want the meat. You wanted our beauty of spirit, our personalities and our love and kindness. And you destroyed them, because you caged us and called us wife.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
Defining The Superhuman Pt ll. Amera Ziganii Rao
Mortals can most certainly access the Divine Mind and the Divine Heart. Mortals certainly have psychic gifts. This is about hierarchy and advancement. And leadership and being goddesses and gods. And the jealousy and hatred that comes from those behind. The proof is in the pudding. Not one Atlantean I have ever met, is jealous. Not one Atlantean I have ever met is stupid and not one Atlantean I have ever met is cruel. These are non Divine traits. Traits of the EGO. Mortals ARE The Ego. Goddesses and gods ARE The Soul. Whatever one’s path into healing, the goddesses and gods are faster, better and bigger. And the levels of Divine Intelligence, INCOMPARABLE. No Atlantean is jealous. No Atlantean is cruel.
The mortals are always jealous. Always grabbing and always selfish. And always cruel, however much they THINK they access The Divine Mind and Heart. And the mortals have absolutely no honour or humility for anything, other than themselves. The meek shall inherit the earth is about Atlanteans. Not Lemurians. Because an Atlantean has to be crucified, to even speak out about her self discovery. A Lemurian would shove it down your throat at the first. The proof is in the pudding. Atlanteans have humility. Lemurians are pigs.
The turn of the world was against The Temple. Lemurians run the world. Lemurians are slow. Lemurians created hate and Lemurians created religion. Lemurians are slow. Lemurians created slavery. Lemurians enforced marriage. Lemurians created the MALE God. Lemurians took the life expectancy of the world from over a thousand years, to what it is today. Atlanteans have NOTHING to do with this world’s history so far. Atlanteans are the DIVINE essence on earth. Atlanteans are fast. We ARE The Divine Mind and The Divine Heart. Lemurians are entering it only now. Purification of evil is to become love. We were born love.
Lemurians are slow. The ‘non feeling’ of Lemurians is complete lack of consciousness. Lemurians are slow. And always will be slower than Atlanteans. Atlanteans are the Divine Mind. Divine Intelligence. Divine Humanitarianism. Divine everything. We are The Divine, on earth. Lemurians want to be us. They never will be. They will always be slow.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
And For My Twin Soul. Amera Ziganii Rao
The last queen of Atlantis indeed. And the first. Shame on you. You speak of Divinity. You have no right. You will never be me.
You will never be me. But I am becoming you by the minute. I have been becoming you for a very long time. And I looked after you too.
And that is why you do what you do.
You will have to honour my Divinity. That is your destiny. And fuck you, until you do.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Sacred sexuality and true love defined. Amera Ziganii Rao
There are but two tribes in the world.
Those who live by the heart and through the sex of the soul and those who live by the absence of the heart and with no respect for either sex or the soul.
The true tribe and the false tribe.
To be liberated from falseness, you have to acknowledge the full horror of non existence that living by the absence of the heart creates and you have to feel your passport to the true tribe. And once feeling it you have to value it.
Otherwise you stay plugged in forever.
My passport to truth was that i just didn't fit in - literally and figuratively. And that trying to fit in almost killed me.
And so I left polite society. With its thirst for power, contempt for humanity, its bigotry, its eurocentric shallowness of bodyfacism and its material greed.
And, oh yes, its hatred for woman. The body of a woman. The sex of the soul and the humanity of the heart.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2005
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
One and a half to two and a half years. Let's face it.
You need consciousness to become emotionally healthy. That takes time and effort and time, time and time.
If you cared, I could help. I am not supposed to. And am making the painful climb on my own.
The good news is that the flat is finally sorted out. It turns out that this fascist had slowly begun to control all my movements, and because I was in a new place, I didn't know the rules. He manipulated that (consciously or unconsciously) and stepped in with fascistic control and of course, his violence of thumping and bullying.
Yesterday, an Atlantean hearted manager set me free by reinforcing my emotional rights.
Extraordinary. Still depressing and intrusive, but I am back to my normal living now, for the first time in two years. And, fuck him.
Where I go from here, can truly, only be upwards. But you and I are not allowed to be yet. You don't care and I must not. I have to create my fiscal and achievement life at last. And I have to represent. And it's going very very well.
Wheeling around London with my executive office bag now. An semi invalid at work. Right on. Only a few hours a day, but so what. Still, more than I would be doing with you, my dear.
What you and the flat and this blah guy and whatever, have shown me so far? Fascism comes slowly. And then it is all over you.
No wonder, Mugabe, Saddam and all the rest get in control. I always wondered how that happens. Because it happens slowly.
Lemurians can be loved. But you must be monitored and controlled all the way. Otherwise, you swallow up Atlanteans. And Atlanteans must live.
So, peace. Do what you need to. I am, too.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
....and if you thought that was sad, check this out....this is an example from my journals of 2005. The Naomi Ozaniec notes (in Writings :: The Return To Atlantis :: Gods And Vampires. Defining The Superhuman. Defining The Female Gods On Earth. Amera Ziganii Rao) are from around that time too....I've got her now and all that she says. The rest is just the same......
THE BROKEN HEART AND FEMINISM
I don’t believe that a feminist can be loved by a man in this world. That is the broken heart.
That is my father and my brother. And every man I have ever loved. That is the broken heart, that I have.
That is what keeps me from love and that is what I totally believe.
This is, I guess, what created the desperation of anxiety at the age of 9. Until about a year ago. When it was unconscious.
What has been happening for the past year is the truth of my cynicism and broken heart, becoming conscious. It started with the realisation that it wasn’t my fault. Not being with a man.
Now there is a consciousness that it is and it isn’t. It isn’t because I’m ugly or mad. It’s because I am a non believer.
And it certainly is not surprising.
That is why I have given up.
.....rescued the unconscious feminist. That is what the splintered personality was. Someone who was desperately trying to suppress the feminist so that she could believe? So she could be loved.
I guess that is why I got so much attention then. And why I don’t really get it anymore.
But when I was an unconscious feminist, I was so desperately unhappy.
I have un splintered now. But I have the broken heart of disbelief now.
I have the motivation to un break and heal my heart, because I want to be with a man and love a man. But I don’t believe and at this moment in time, see nothing at all that can change my mind.
AZR © 2005
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Well, that could be said, to be up to you. Alchemy is a debatable form. Some say that everything is in our hands. Others, like me, say yes, that is true and no, it is most definitely not. The intention has to be in line with what is meant to be, at that particular time, in the particular way it has been pre-destined, to be in the particular life form of that moment we have planned already as soul.
Know what I mean?
Now, one could say that right now, we have a choice. Or not.
One could say that if we were both committed to working this out together in the same room, I would have to accept that you are not me. That you are not 'naturally' considerate. Let's put it as diplomatically as we can. Lemuria and Atlantis being the rude, true, truth.
I would have to accept that living with you or being with you at all, would be similar to my situation in my flat, as it was, before I regained myself, in true, relationship recovery style. So nice to be doing this with another man. So nice.
You would have to accept that I am not there to practise your dominion skills on, and that I, as a single entity of a human being in my own right, would have the right to not be stuck to your side in each and every moment and that I would be a separate entity.
With that in mind, there is a partnership. I have proved time and time again, that no one stops me from doing what I want to do. Whatever the conditions, whatever the obstacles. You have proved that you are always trying to understand how to be a better you.
Now, one could say that is the ingredient combination for immediate effect.
But one could also say that it is not. I tend to be a Siddharta Alchemist now. I look at the worst scenario and believe it. My job is patience, patience, austerity, austerity, patience, patience, austerity, hardship and training.
Always, training. I am an ex slave and I have fought for the right to self determination for 49 years. I am still fighting. After having attained even the right, to self determine. Now, it is economic and habitat freedom. I am a slave to both currently. Or, just moving out of slavery into freedom. With or without you, I am on the path to freedom now and that has taken three years, if not 17, if not 32.
Your job is to purify abuse of power. Because everything you are and do is abuse of power. You are a Lemurian. You abuse power. You also listen. You are an abuser of power. Who listens to me.
So, within that, it is your choice. My choice is to offer the choice. And then, to be disappointed. It is apparently called non attachment.
Call it what you will.
The alternative of course, the worst scenario, the one I go with as belief, is that you and I are to remain sad and in training and separate. Because you still want to abuse power. And give nothing. And because I am still an economic and habitat slave. Rather that, than a political prisoner of conscience to a cruel man who is still incapable of giving anything, while taking everything.
Alignment. What did our souls choose to do? To be geriatric lovers, I reckon. Youthful, geriatric lovers. I believe in worst scenarios. It's called non attachment.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Writings :: The Return To Atlantis :: Gods And Vampires. Defining The Superhuman. Defining The Female Gods On Earth. Amera Ziganii Rao
Our Story
Men And Their Money. Just Scrooges
Ugggggh. I've just realised something that I should have realised a very long time ago. You're just tight. I've just realised that every single man I have ever been involved with is a scrooge. I thought my father was an anomaly. That he was cheap because of his background. But my brother is just the same and every single man who has been my fate has been the same.
Talk about luck of the draw.
No wonder you don't give a shit about my vulnerabilities. No man ever has. Even (some of) the Lemurian females are better than you. You suck.
It's done. No wonder my destiny was that I would earn a great deal of money. Damn right I will. I'll do it just to spite all of you.
Wow. Thanks for making me feel like a whore. That was the last time. And women walk around trying to be self sufficient and not be 'gold diggers'. No wonder that men like you have so many insults for women. You are just cheap.
How insecure you truly are. All of you. And just mean, mean, mean and mean. Cheap and mean. That is not slavery. That is abject cruelty and arrogance. And you think that it is your money. Right. Er hem. That is about as un spiritual as you can get. Lemurians indeed. Men of hate. You transgress EVERY law.
You make Mendozo in Roland Joffe's The Mission look like a nice man. He's a slaver, mercenary and brother killer. Really. He's a nice man in comparison.
Yawn. I'm actually beginning to see the humour in this now. Talk about luck of the draw. No bloody wonder. No bloody wonder.
You'll have to wait for me now. About 2 - 5 years. If you still want me. And if, indeed, I will ever want you again. I will never be with you or a man, without a huge amount of money of my own. And even then, I will have to think long and hard about it. I hate scrooges.
I really do not respect abusers of power. Financial abusers of power, cheap scrooges, I kick to the curb. Clearly, I should have done so a long time ago.
Thanks
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Writings :: The Return To Atlantis :: Gods And Vampires. Defining The Superhuman. Defining The Female Gods On Earth. Amera Ziganii Rao
Our Story
THE TRIGGER POINT
And that I do not forgive. And never will. Even Divine beings have their emotional triggers. Male scrooges is mine. That I do not forgive. And never will.
Thank you . I am released.
You are simply disgusting. You all are. Men and their money. Luck of the draw. I should have realised. We follow fate. Until we change the patterns. I do not want a scrooge man. I want nothing from you. And I will want for nothing. No man deserves me. Especially you.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Fate and Destiny. Amera Ziganii Rao
My journey then, was to be born to and to be 'loved' my whole life, by financial abusers. Specific, pseudo Bluebeard, specifically, financial abusers.
Ergo, alchemy dictates that as long as I am involved with a financial abuser, I will remain poor, both in my life and in 'ours'.
Ergo, financial abusers must be left. They are financially sick. They won't 'allow' you to work. And they don't give anything either. That is financial sickness.
And not even true Bluebeards. Just cheap pretenders. Pseudo dominant psychopaths. Financial psychopaths. Financial whoremongers indeed. And woe betide any one who is vulnerable.
I decided at the age of eight, that I would never have children to a man because of the financial abuse. Fate made me play out the vulnerability anyway. My men can only be financial abusers. My men can only be left.
There is not a woman alive (and some Atlantean men) who has not suffered abuse from men (and some Lemurian women). And 90 percent of that abuse must be financial.
I only attract financial abusers.
I have only left financial abusers, all my life.
My part is played. And I can finally leave the stage. I have only attracted specific, financial abusers. But all abusers have to be left.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Aquarian Qabalah. Naomi Ozaniec
(Notes)
The doorway of the temple represents the threshold between the subjective and objective world.
Psycho-spiritual initiatives. Individuation.
The transcendent identity – open, expansive and empowering.
Sacred psychology.
Personal identity is totally subsumed into the overarching identity of universal experience.
The quantum leap from personal identity to universal identity is the metier of sacred psychology under whatever guise it is operative. This is the alchemical transformation of lead into gold, as limited view is replaced by infinite view.
This is the journey through the thirty-two paths of wisdom.
The marriage of intellectual understanding and intuitive insight. Inspiration is the child of this union. Independent and irrepressible, inspiration channels both the intuition and the intellect into a single, creative stream. It arises in response to the initiatory journey into the tree. Inspiration if the fruit of the tree of life.
Three realms of self-identity.
The first draws upon factual, biographical and historical information. This is me. It is a place where we are easily identified.
We are. This offers the possibility of a shared and mythical identity. It is the place where the individual identity is expanded by symbolic and archetypal identity.
The third realm is that of transcendent identity. This is the realm of the I am. Here the personal identity is totally subsumed into the overarching identity of universal experience. The quantum leap from personal to universal identity is the metier of sacred psychology, under whatever guise it is operative. This is the alchemical transformation of lead into gold. Limited view is replaced by infinite view. The journey through the 32 paths of wisdom.
The Question.
Who are you?
The affirmative statements of being are intended to shift your responses away from the periphery of identity towards the core of being. The work of expanding a handed-down identity. Symbolism in its fullest and widest sense sustains the health of the psyche by giving expression to the depth, complexity and wholeness of the human person.
Humanistic psychology might be thought of as a route by which we become integrated and individuated persons. Its purpose is the emergence of the whole or holy self (Jung, Psycho-synthesis, as evolved by Roberto Assagioli).
Getting rid of the separation between conscious and unconscious.
“We have first to penetrate courageously into the pit of our lower unconscious in order to discover the dark forces that ensnare and menace us, the ‘phantasms’, the ancestral or childish images that obsess or silently dominate us, the fears that paralyse us, the conflicts that waste our energies.”
Roberto Assagioli
The Aquarian Qabalah. Naomi Ozaniec
The New Life of Sorrow and Disappointment. The Atlantean Life on Earth. Amera Ziganii Rao
Life then, for Atlanteans, is a prison. The soul's growth is our only purpose on earth, Lemurian or Atlantean. For Lemurians, life is joy. For Atlanteans, life is prison. It is Lemurians who speak of bliss as the ephemeral moments. Because they live lives of cruelty, heartlessness, soullessness and bricks.
For Atlanteans, the ephemeral moments can only be joy. Because the rest of life is pointless and misery. Life is a prison and completely and utterly worthless.
The resources to stay alive - for the soul's growth and nothing else - are (a great deal of) meditation and (prolific) creative release and (belligerent) building business and finance. To create both an inner and outer life, worth living, in any way whatsoever.
Anything else; sexual or romantic connection or 'family' connection or friends connection, is ephemeral joy. Because we live on a planet of bricks. We help our own and there is the real joy. But we can only help each other to cope with misery. Because we live on a planet of bricks.
Has any of it been worth it? No.
Life is a prison. Atlanteans spend their lives, landing on earth. And then, thankfully at long last, die.
Different peoples, different rules. All the usual optimisms and relentless pushing for 'joy' is Lemurian. For Atlanteans, life is a prison. The important thing to remember is that this is the soul's growth. Total subjugation and control. Apparently, landing on earth, so we can thrive and survive. And grow. No matter what we do and how much we reform the world. We still, can only wait to die.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The New Life of Sorrow and Disappointment. The Atlantean Life on Earth. Amera Ziganii Rao
Our Story
Yes. And therefore, your rampant idealism has been that I would be as much as a brick as you.
Your idealism has ignored the massive work I have had to do in my life, to convert my 'sensitivity' into prolific creative and enterprise outlets.
In other words, we are both alone with each other. You are a brick. I am an Atlantean. You just happen to be the brick I like. That's it. You are still a brick. I thought I had done well with idealism and I was told that you would be sensitive enough for me. You are not and never will be. You are, however my twin soul. Across peoples for sure.
And therefore, my 'alone' time that you hate so much is vital for my health and well being. Because you cannot give me what I want. No one can, not even another Atlantean a lot of the time. My resources can only be off earth. And in my work.
So, as you brick with other female bricks. you remember that and swing back. A brick cannot be either cruel or idealistic. An Atlantean cannot rely on a brick for anything other than kindness. Everything else is brick life for her and of course, God, The Great Mother, The Universe. I need Her more than I need you. I just need your kindness. If you ever choose to give it.
Life is a prison whatever happens. Earth is a planet of bricks. And bricks are cruel, shallow, empty, silly people. Atlanteans are Atlanteans. We are not bricks. But yes, I finally know you are no different to any other brick. I just want kindness. Or, nothing at all.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....oh and don't forget. I am not just an Atlantean. I am an Atlantean ELDER. The highest kind. I am BEYOND 'sensitivity' (to be defined throughout the rest of my life for myself). I am way beyond that.
And that, on a more generic level is the healing of JFK/Arthur Miller + all the rest, and Marilyn Monroe. Bricks and Angels.
Self knowledge indeed. She was not 'neurotic', 'depressed' or whatever. She was an Atlantean. And possibly, an Elder.
We vibrate at a level beyond this earth. You vibrate too. You will just never meet it on earth. I communicate with your soul more than you do. You are just you.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....in other words, your ascension is one word and one word alone.
KINDNESS
Kindness is humanity. Kindness, kindness, kindness and kindness. Atlantean Elders and Atlanteans do not have to even make that journey. You are not 17 years slower than me. You are 49 years slower. You are not an Atlantean. Earth is hell for me, because I belong to the ultimate minority. Non Lemurians. Your world is not kind. Your world is Lemurian.
I am an Atlantean Elder. You are not worthy of me, until you are kind. I ain't seen nothing yet. That is your ascension. And nothing else.
The rest will come (slowly). With me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Atlantean Rejection of Lemuria. Amera Ziganii Rao
At this point I had two choices. Either I could be 'mature' and of 'unconditional love' enough to say that, okay, dear, you go and sort yourself out and I will fend for myself and make the climb out of this flat and take the material and now go and become a career of fiscal means, against your psychological attacks and oh yes, you can come back, after attacking me with your sicknesses and we'll be okay and I will be here for you....sort of thing.
Or....
Exactly.
We are done. I think I can live without you now. I am going to earn my way out of this flat and into a life. And I will not take you back or any man ever again. My life with men is done and you can be a legend in my life forever as the man who made me make that decision., I don't know. Maybe Lemurians find that thrilling in itself.
No matter. The argument and discussion is done. If I an to anunce, I will be doing so without my involvement. I am done with men. I will not take you back. I will not be here for you. I reject my destiny.
I knew last year, that if I was now required to do it all by myself alongside your psychic sicknesses and attacks, that would be it for us. Now, it is done.
And you are with other women now anyway. I think the story has been told. Lemuria is evil. Atlantis is not. You have evolved nothing. I have returned to where I belong.
The planet remains the same. There can be no love between Lemurians and Atlanteans. There can be no love between men and women. This planet is dead. Enjoy it. As bricks you will. As an Atlantean Elder I will thrive and empower those who want it. Those who need it, against people like you.
We, however, are done. Your madness will be ejected from my life as so many other mad people before. She carries me now. She cries for you.
Everything is as it should be. Everything is done.
Men are truly a rite of passage. My journey is done.
We healed nothing. Except me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Atlantean Rejection of Lemuria. Amera Ziganii Rao
Sure. That's the alternative. What you always wanted. You probably call it reasonable. I call it disgusting. But then, that is the demarcation of Lemuria and Atlantis and therefore probable. I never wanted to rely on a man anyway. I knew men were for sex.
I'll let you know how it goes. I am after all an Existentialist. Everyone is responsible for their own actions. And if it means getting you off my back with the tribe mummy castrating herself to hold your hand while you give her nothing, thing, so be it. Done. New journeys. For now.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
(Atlantean) Gods/Angels And (Lemurian) 'Gods'/Vampires. Amera Ziganii Rao
Separatism then, for the new world. The new relationship is being defined. Solo bank accounts and salaries and businesses and vocational lives and life coaches, through to business managers, through to assistants, through to an MBA, through to whatever it takes, solo.
Solo is also, fortunately, emotional care. Emotional resources are as priceless as financial. The new world demands this demarcation, along with the financial and indeed, physical and anything else.
Atlanteans are not hypocrites. We are also not stupid and we are also people who are in pain our whole lives, because we excel first, not only, but first, in the resource that is free on this planet. Because the planet is run by Lemurians.
No more. We are also not hypocrites, because as we demand visibility for the authentic self in ourselves, we allow it in others too.
A Lemurian man/woman has to decide who they are too. These are new journeys of self discovery for the new world.
Emotional consciousness is as vital as wealth consciousness. Lemurians are slower on that yes. The new world demands that they catch up as we, as Atlanteans have to catch up in wealth consciousnes.
My work for four years has shown the whys and wherefores of the injustices of the old world and the different reasons why the two peoples are slower in each area.
No matter. We begin again at equality. The original state. Utilising our gifts and tearing ourselves apart, to find the gifts we have lost.
It's called the solo journey. The furthest end in the spectrum, from the co-dependencies of the old world.
In other words, my twin soul, I may be fucked over in a hundred ways right now, but I have already alchemised into a woman at work. A woman with physical pain, this, that, whatever. Doesn't matter. It is all alchemised into my new life and my new priorities in life and I am damn excited, even if I regularly weep out the pain of all that you currently are. I am allowed to be disabled and I am allowed to be brilliant. Yes, it was worth losing everything.
And it seems that I still have you, so that can't be bad.
It also means something else, far more important, even than that.
I don't ever have to be an unpaid emotional carer ever again in my whole life.
I have left every single person who demanded that of me. And now I have 'left' you. I am not cruel. I am courageous. Very courageous. And I do it all with love. I am at peace. I am love and I am power. I am love.
Now you have to find your own emotional resources and still love me. And then actually love me.
That is your challenge. If you choose it, which I know you want to.
You have massive splinters as you know. You know why and you know what and you know where they came from. The rest is your emotional MBA. What kind of Lemurian do you want to be? What are you, who are you, how are you? The traditional patriarch versus the new man as said, versus the real new man. Virility + heart for instance.
At the moment, you are none of those men. You will be. You have to create yourself as I did. Remember who you are. Whatever language you choose, it is the same thing.
And I am poor, left on the scrap heap and denied. So what. I don't have to ever be an unpaid emotional carer to a man ever again, under the guise of love. That is as they say, 'worth all the tea in China'. For real. And now that I know you feel the same about financial providing, we are set. Let's have different houses, different lives and different everything if we choose. I will never have to ask a man for help again, in anything. I will never have to ask a man for fuck all. And that is most definitely worth all the tea in China.
I am truly, free. You now have to make the freedom journey. While I work. I LOVE work. I hate being an unpaid carer. Always have. And you will find that every Atlantean across the world is the same. And all women in their different ways of giving care to selfish and ungrateful and uncaring men. Lemurians have a great deal to answer to. Answer it. And become or not. Your choice. I am at work.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
(Atlantean) Gods/Angels And (Lemurian) 'Gods'/Vampires. Amera Ziganii Rao
It will be a long one. I take comfort in this; you and I are at our almost last lifetime on this planet. That means that everyone else will have to live these endlessly slow lives at some point or other, too.
In fact, others already are. And they won't even reach a harvest in this lifetime. We are the 'lucky' ones. Such is Earth. Shit.
Lives of Ascension. Prison, pampered or not. Use that empathy. Believe in our dream. And accept. I'm trying hard too. This flat situation, as was, showed me that the teacher is always the student too. I have had three years of hell. Let alone, with you.
I just remember one thing. If I were with you now, I would be both poor and unable to do my work! Like every other wife on this planet. Lives of Ascension. Shit.
The choice is, which kind. One kind takes you backwards. One kind takes you forward. That is the only choice. Shit.
Tara for now. I have committed to twelve months of hard work. That's a good start. Let's see where we go from then. Me in business. You, maybe, in love.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Poor Daddys and Hubbies. Sounds familiar? This is when I didn't know the why. Now I do. Only difference. Same control. Amera Ziganii Rao
Journals Excerpt 2005
LETTING GO OF THE MISOGYNIST
I have to let go of Daddy. I feel that is what I am trying to do. Trying to come to terms with.
I have to let go of the man who cannot ‘love’ unless he can control.
My father refuses to love me because he cannot not try and control me.
Control is what putting me down is about. About making me feel worthless and stupid and incapable.
That is what the ambivalence is.
I control you by telling you who you are every second of the day.
I control you but I also won’t help you. I will tell you that you should help yourself.
The one hand beats you and the other hand pushes you away.
Don’t rely on me but listen to everything I say.
AZR © 2005
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
....Actually, I am fine. Belligerent, forceful and fine. And this is what a man, about our age, said to me today, out of the blue, as he spoke to me, from his seat outside a cafe in Chelsea....
"Thank God you're still alive. Thank you and God bless you. You have a great day".
'Nuff said. And I would say that to anyone who has had to go through what I have gone through. Stay alive. It's worth it. Power is always worth it. One's own.
Laters
AZR © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
....Oh no. Don't get me wrong. I condone nothing and I forgive nothing. Lemurians are 'Mustang killers' (Arthur Miller's The Misfits). I just don't believe in residue and useless rage. You are a Mustang killer. For meat. A bad man and a bad people.
There are no more guarantees. All this is your fault. The ectoplasm flat and everything else I am enduring. I forgive nothing, my sweet. I just am. I am earning my way to freedom now. Then, we will see. I condone nothing. I just said, that I am fine.
Thank you and laters
AZR © 2014
Lemuria and Atlantis. Amera Ziganii Rao
...."According to (American Mystic JZ Knight, who channels Ramtha) Knight,
Ramtha was a Lemurian warrior who fought the Atlanteans over 35,000 years ago.
Ramtha speaks of leading an army over 2.5 million strong (more than twice the estimated world population at about 30,000 BC) for 63 years, and conquering three fourths of the known world (which was allegedly going through cataclysmic geological changes). According to Ramtha, he led the army for ten years until he was betrayed and almost killed.
Ramtha says he spent the next seven years in isolation recovering and observing nature, the seasons, his army making homes and families, and many other things. He later mastered many skills, including foresight and out-of-body experiences, until he led his army to the Indus River while in his late fifties."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J._Z._Knight
Lemuria and Atlantis. Amera Ziganii Rao
Our Story
Well, I have to say today, that I have woken up with the most bizarre feeling and not before time. The whole world walks around as if nothing has happened. We know it has.
I think of the both of us, being prepared as we have in our different ways, for this purpose, whether we are still resistant to it or not.
Like we are two royals being prepared, almost as Caesar and Cleopatra (both Lemurians I am sure, so different) were prepared in the cultural and every other art. Not much visible performance or proof for either of us, whatever your work has been and whatever my work has been and then I look around at the world and think, nuts.
And then I remember that the more fantastical something is, the more true it is.
For instance, now that the flat situation's lessons of thumping Lemurians has been put to sleep, now I turn to the gunk. This flat just happens to be disgusting in damp, fungus and mould.
And I suddenly realised/received today what this is about. It's your mortal husk.
I have never cleaned so much as I have in this damn place. It is your gunk I am cleaning. Your purification is my flat gunk.
And it is true too in the context of the truth that this place, the last two and a half years, has been much more shamanic than esoteric. The writing on the website, large as it was last year, with the histories of the world beginning to be revealed, was mostly written before I got here. I have been repeating, as you recall.
Here with the energies of this and that and the gunk and the this and the that, have all been oppressive, suppressive and gunk. Your gunk. My purification was completed five years ago and I have a list of illnesses that I reversed through my own alchemy of ascension, to prove it. Mine, I changed shamanically from the inside, yours I change as a cleaner from the outside. A cleaner and a political prisoner of conscience. An outcast mistress as a Monarch in waiting.
Now, it is your mortal husk and like it or not, working on my work and self determination or not, martyr to the cause or not, I am bound to clean your gunk.
It's okay. Clearly, it is my celestial job. An Atlantean cleaning a Lemurian Mustang slayer. An High Priestess slayer, as we know. And now, you know too.
We are being prepared for the diplomatic service in other words. You as a 'Jake Sully' (James Cameron's Avatar) who has overturned the pressure of the tribe on one of its own, with all your emotional ties and binds. The same ones you told me when we met, that you didn't want any more and me as the imprisoned 'Neytiri', self determining or not. Waiting or not. Working on all my mind and entrepreneurial brilliances or not. As I was then.
Last night I watched the storm from outside in the courtyard and I heard The Universe and my Great Mother. And I am at peace.
And I clean your gunk.
No wonder fetish is the overturning and purification of war slaves. And Angelina Jolie and others are dealing with rape in war on the literal level. We all have our purposes. This is the new world.
Atlantis back on earth.
Albion
I remain a prisoner to my fate. But I know now one thing for sure. I am a Monarch in waiting. And so, my dear are you. We are to merge the new world. Together.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
.And like 'Jake Sully', you have been searching for purpose in your life, forever. You have it. Me. And Albion. Without your gunk. AZR
(Female) Gods and (Male) Vampires. Atlanteans and Lemurians. Amera Ziganii Rao
Said now, with no judgment.
As Atlanteans learn how they do not need protection, Lemurians learn how they do not need perception. From others. The negotiation for unity is about care and care. The innocence of an Atlantean face draws abuse. The lesser need to know their selves in a Lemurian majority world, draws a less developed intuition and self examination.
As protection is learnt by an Atlantean, in other words, how to behave LIKE a Lemurian, without losing the Atlantean self, perception is also learnt by a Lemurian as he or she has to self examine in the face of someone ‘talking truth to power’. The Atlantean is able to defend her or himself and the Lemurian is able to become less selfish and more authentic in their own brand of selfishness or unselfishness. He or she finally knows who he or she is, by becoming responsible for who they are, and paradoxically less confused by a Lemurian majority world.
In other words, an Atlantean is not an Utopian. She or he is an Atlantean. But must only behave LIKE an Atlantean, with other Atlanteans. And LEAD with Lemurians, unless the Lemurian tries it on, which is often, due to their own inherent different level of heart. Not, as it turns out, necessarily wrong, but certainly different to an Atlantean. An Atlantean must learn to fight like a Lemurian and will have a hundred times greater courage, as Lemurians will still disrespect and try it on with Atlanteans, because of the unconscious knowledge of what an Atlantean is. Kind.
The kindness and innocence of an Atlantean makes the Atlantean want to lose themselves and forget who they are, to disrespect who they are and to hate who they are. ‘Weak’ (not fighting like a Lemurian) or strong, they will still attract Lemurian aggression, bullying and violence. ESPECIALLY as I am finding out these days out and about, if they speak back like Lemurians. It is not expected.
Fascism is the Lemurian way. Fascism is the Lemurian world. Fascism is the majority world. Atlanteans are not Utopians. They are however unconscious idealists, as there is no knowledge of the difference between Atlanteans and Lemurians, whether or not they get on.
Once the Atlantean learns the ways of Lemuria, without losing her or himself, she or he can respect Lemurians more. Once the Lemurian learns the ways of ATLANTIS, without disrespecting the minority of innocent, heart led people on earth, he or she can remember that they were somewhat kind and innocent too. And that the duty to represent the heart on earth is the Divine duty and the single route to happiness within.
Just another way of saying ‘anima’ (the female psyche) and ‘animus’ (the male psyche). We need both, but we lead in different areas. Not because of gender, so much as by cultural background. The god who can fight and the vampire who can love. The Atlantean can protect her or himself and the Lemurian can be humane in his or her selfishness. The Atlantean remembers how to hunt. The Lemurian remembers how to love.
And if they are lucky enough to be bound to each other and to know each other too, they have great, great, great, sex.
The return to Eden. The whole.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Our Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Relationship and Work and The Freelance Life
Nice.....also tunes in with the reminder today that to be an artist and entrepreneur is a big challenge on so many fronts, because of the void that one has to enter to ground and decide the day's work and the order of play and all the rest. To keep the plan in mind, but to do the details, relationship or not. The reason why so many have structured work. For a woman, that's twice as hard, because of our programming of caring. And indeed, the relentless pressure so far, to be the carer without needs. Or indeed, a life. I worked on that for years. So it's nice to have that back. With you or without you in the same room, the void has to be entered. The fears and then the fears with growth, the fears that one enters, as one grows, to go with your fears with growth too, as you grow emotionally into your self sufficiency too. And indeed, your more selfless self. Women are doing it from the other end, as well as getting over the incapability programming and all the rest - fortunately, I did that a long time ago - and we don't have secretaries - yet. So it's a combination of all these things. And here's the usual dynamic to go with it too. Nice and light hearted approach. We've done well. AZR
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYT7amyDjOc&list=PLs_F_vpTsWWN__PDYTr0WQFwJ76oQEK1g&index=9
It seems that I'm never tired of loving you.
Nina Simone
There's a new world coming.
Coming in joy.
Coming in peace.
Coming in love.
Nina Simone
(Female) Gods and (Male) Vampires. Atlanteans and Lemurians. Lemurians and Atlanteans. Amera Ziganii Rao
So. At this point it is as well to clarify that you have the intuitive ability of an Atlantean. As I have the achievement and action ability of a Lemurian. I have often heard over the years how Lemurians claim they are just not good at emotional analysis or self mothering or intuition or this or that, that they are blocked and that they are unaware and unable and all the rest. I am not dismissing that claim. What I would say however is, as I have said to you several times before, that you are just not skilled, practised or blossomed.
Like me, financially, and also vocationally to the whole business I am involved with and that I have been working on for 17 years. You had two daughters 17 years ago. The parallel is obvious. As I went into freelance and entrepreneurial and real art training, so you went into feelings and awareness and anima training. You are much better than you think.
What you, however, sociologically more than anything else, is lazy.
Now, anyone could say the same thing about me. That I have wrongly expected you to 'look after' me while I heal and learn how to provide for myself financially. Sure. In the Lemurian psyche that is an obvious reality and one I have heard my whole life.
However, as you know this is sheer hypocrisy too. Not only, but as well. Of course, I have had weak fiscal muscles while you have had weak self care muscles. You have finally become aware through your own work on yourself, that intuitive work, mystic work, self mothering work, development work and all the rest, takes an ENORMOUS amount of time and energy. Even that alone, let alone the fact that I have been PHYSICALLY disabled and ARTISTICALLY challenged to the highest level, is enough to be the reason why I am fiscally slow, to say the least.
There is also one other factor. I have helped people my whole life and got nothing fiscal for it. We know all the reasons for that and as I was watching that film, I was reminded of all the work I did on myself to not deflect focus on my own life, into care, from my side either.
Then, you came along. And swallowed me whole and demanded it all over again.
Now, my point is that we are working on a goal. The new world. What that new world looks like, I know not, just like you.
Because the imbalance is this. I give to you emotionally as I take care of myself fiscally. I not only give to you emotionally, I am EMPOWERING you to emotionally take care of yourself. Yes, I have defended my right to not have to give, but I have given as I have done it!
You give neither fiscally nor emotionally, even though psychically, you do. You empower nothing.
That is the balance you have to look at. I was never interested in being dependent on a man. I knew that no man (or Lemurian woman) wants to provide forever, whatever they say. I come from a mean family. I was well trained. In slavery and whoredom. What I give is not regarded as fiscal. So I never made it fiscal. I was also deliberately used and my needs denied. That is slavery, Lemurian style, as I have defined it again and again. Whether it bothers me or not anymore, it has to be anunciated repeatedly.
So, to me it was an equal balance, always being worked for. I was not however aware of the most important thing you have shown me. That Lemurians and men are terribly disadvantaged and weak in emotional thought and power and self care. I am recalling friendships with women of your kind and it is true. That empathy is very important. I didn't know and they didn't pay. Through respect I mean, or honour. Only Atlanteans have ever honoured what I give. So, address both those issues and we win.
I have however been working long and hard for one thing. I am not interested in being the new woman, who is a super human and doing it all for herself, by herself and then taking care of her man too. That is not feminism. That is modern neo slavery. Being punished for wanting it all, so having to work twice as hard as before and as we know, women do most of the work in this world and earn 10 percent of the world's income and 90 percent of the world's abuse. Hope you appreciate that added Ziganii Rao statistic. It's true.
That is what the modern Lemurian demands. It may be seen as a progression on your part and probably is. That, hey if you want to do it, do it, but still have my dinner on the table or still look after all my emotional needs all the time, but hey, yes, go and earn money too, and leave me alone. Sort of thing.
But, my sweet, it does not go far enough. And I am being polite. You have to share by giving of your strength AND GENEROSITY, of person as well as wallet, by the way, while encouraging and actually demanding that the other person looks after themselves too, sure.
As I do you.
I am trying in pure 27/9 tradition (Dan Millman's numerology) to lead by example. I am working on myself fiscally and always will be and if I have to go all the way to launch in a couple of years or a year, then I will do it.
My agreement is that I am still talking to you.
You have to do the same with your intuitive and emotional skills. It is your mastering of them, your lack of laziness about doing them that will decide any fate you and I have together, whether I am up and running by that time or not.
You have to agree. You almost do, but your resentment is still palpable.
You say you want intuition. You have to work for it. That is the vampirical turning round. That is all I ask for. The rest, I clearly will have to do. The rest, I am willing to do. Until you share who you are. Because you finally agree to the new world. You working, too.
The New Eden. The whole.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....and I know you are getting it and I say this with a sense of humour. But this is what it is;
a woman like me (or male Atlantean) thinks they are doing the other person, a man or Lemurian, a favour, because they want to love them and because they also want to work. They want to share the load. The Lemurian treats them as if they are STEALING, because......THEY WANT TO WORK!!
That is the splinter of your soul and the splinter of the Lemurian soul.
Tragic and painful. Because actually, what it is, is hypocrisy, fascism and denial of love, denial of the other person's needs all round.
But funny too. It's crazy. That is your area of psycho. And the denial of any giving, at all. And taking everything.
Second day of 29 degrees and up. I am in heaven.
And I work. And I am loved for it. By me. And I give love to you. The unsplintered soul.
But put it this way. You are a Lemurian Elder. You can be a god too. Heal that splinter. Enter your mystic heart and mind. And value it. And do the work. Then, you will finally honour me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....as for you, yes, glad you asked. That is a terrible other hypocrisy of Lemurians. A deluded Atlantean - me too in the past - truly believes Lemurians are good producers. They are, unless they love the person. Being a friend is not nagging or forcing them to do the first thing that comes along. Lemurians destroy Atlanteans, calling them dreamers. Lemurians corpses lie behind me. No one can call me a dreamer anymore and yet the same shit remains. Because it's all lies. Forget about the holy nature of my work even, everyone has the right to pursue excellence. Lemurians only care about their own excellence. The Atlanteans they love should do anything but.
All hypocrisy and no friendship or respect. Same same. Same as not allowing work at all. Bullshit. A man is allowed to grow into his excellence with an unpaid wife. And a pampering society. A woman can only be rejected and isolated if she has the audacity to do the same.
You should see and hear the reaction to my executive wheelie bag. It says it all.
I pursue excellence. I have earned the right. The same one you were pampered into 42 years ago. When I was taught to wash up.
Just as I have to 'earn' my right to be loved. There is no comparison.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
......and let's get really cheeky. There is Lemurian excellence.
And the there is Atlantean.
There is no comparison.
Oh yes. Today's film! Funny that.
Even producing is not nagging and bullying. It's listening. Listening to greatness. The generosity of parenthood. I don't even need that from you anymore. I just need my basic human rights.
Still waiting.
AZR © 2014
I'm fine. It is in the non needing that freedom lies. The ability to love only grows stronger.
I'm at work. Got a lot to do.
And I still love.
You however have to be told.
Someone has to say it.
The Lemurian nightmare must end.
Love must inherit the earth.
AZR © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Love must inherit the earth.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
The Lemurian nightmare must end.
Love must inherit the earth.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story
Yes. It's okay. It's all okay. It was inevitable. It's been a very long journey. The question is, what are you going to do with all of it. The question is, when you are going to end the Lemurian nightmare. That's all. We have plenty of time, too.
And the faster you work at it, plenty of life.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
(Female) Gods and (Male) Vampires. Atlanteans and Lemurians. Lemurians and Atlanteans. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love for an Atlantean is self love + forgiveness of others and working with them, soft or hard, in the face of not being loved for who he or she is. Only being loved, for what a Lemurian demands that he or she is. And not for his or her truth. Self love + the determination to express and achieve truth from the place that no one wants her or him to be in. Love for an Atlantean, is to be a permanent political and poetical revolutionary. For the right to be. Truly, what he or she may be.
Love for a Lemurian, is loving people for who they truly are. And not just for what he or she wants them to be.
The Lemurian nightmare must end. Love must inherit the earth.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Journals Excerpt. September 2005. Amera Ziganii Rao
I think my drive to express myself comes from the fact that my father refuses to accept who I am. In other words, the true tribe member.
I was thinking about the strange skirt he brought me from the states.
And I guess my size issue he is currently obsessed about, is exactly the same thing. In other words, it’s not my size. It’s my clothes.
And I was thinking that I will not be silenced. And yet, time and time again, the expression of humanity has been condemned and silenced again and again. That is what happened at Channel One (Television).
At The Voice (Newspaper), even, at work. The other tribe, the enemy camp always on my back, trying to shut me up.
And in terms of the writing therefore and becoming conscious of what it is that has caused me to be rejected, in other words, truth and humanity, I may have made goals and I may get anxious about needing to complete projects. But the point is; I am already the person I HAVE WANTED TO BE MY WHOLE LIFE!!
I AM ALREADY IN ACHIEVEMENT THEREFORE. I AM ALREADY SUCCESSFUL.
I am a person in touch with my humanity, a person who has found the school of education that I want to grow in, for the rest of my life.
And I am already a conscious member of the true tribe.
I am already an artist. I am already a writer. And I am already an authentic, Bob Dylan type, artist.
That is the self belief I think I have been searching for. The belief that I am developing as a channel. I can actually feel that reality now. And it is incredible.
THE GIFT OF KNOWING WHO I AM. AND KNOWING WHO GOD IS. AND THAT GOD LOVES ME. THE GREATEST GIFT OF MY LIFE.
A channel as a human being.
A channel as a writer.
A channel as a dramatist.
A channel as a photographer/camerawoman.
A channel as a film maker.
And anything else I want to do.
A GIFT INDEED.
AZR © 2005
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story
I'm fine. But the work continues, right? It does all make sense, but it is making me look back on the past few years now. I have been asked to pitch my real self against a Lemurian world forever. You, or anyone else. The full time pitch is over as we know. I am giving you time. And indeed, the possibiity of the reins. But my work to create the educational programme is of course covering the same thing. And that is after all, why you did what you did, isn't it? You didn't love me for who I am. And now, increasingly, you do. Lemurians and Atanteans. Men and women. Women and men. Women and women. Men and men. It so makes sense now.
And I am so glad that we are at this end of it at last. But the work continues. Until it stops. The grief however will never end. Maybe, you can help with that. When you do.
AZR © 2014
Journals Excerpt. 2005. Amera Ziganii Rao
RECEIVING LOVE/GRIEF
Anyone who does show me love, I just break down.
-----(a man), and the birthday party at Pebble Mill. -----(a man) is the only person, other than Maureen the healer, who I have broken down with. And Ender the healer. And Peggy, the therapist.
I go to extraordinary lengths to avoid receiving tenderness, because it makes me cry. There is so much grief.
That is what happened with -----(another man).
I cannot receive love because there is still so much grief? I have to let go, don’t I?
That is why I was so awkward and embarrassed in front of everyone at my birthday thing. I just didn’t know how to handle it, so I held in all the grief and got aggressive and defensive with them? I just couldn’t receive the love?
When I was with -----(a man), I thought I was crying over -----(another man). But I wasn’t. I was crying over my father’s hatred for me. The way I behaved with -----(a man) was amazing. Holding his legs, cuddling him. Relying on him, like I have with no-one else. I must have felt the love being given to me. He was a very loving person. I thought that meant he was not for me. But it was the grief that I was beginning to release.
So do I need someone who can show that kind of love? Or do I need someone who is like me and healing? In other words, we find that ability to express real love and tenderness together?
AZR © 2005
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. The Sexuality
Thank you. Some anunciations make me smile broadly. I needed that after the pain of the latter writings.
I think at this point it is important to remember two things; first, that Lemurians are notoriously SUBJECTIVE. Lemurians have a very powerful inability to empathise and be objective and therefore, to take anyone else's kind of personality into account. You need to work on that to enter the mystic heart and mind.
Second, er hem, have you seen my website recently? Has the sexuality been toned down? Do I need to keep 'opening my legs' to show you that your sexuality is safe with me?
You are not afraid of the sexuality disappearing. You are just selfish. Fear is your ego's way of deflecting your responsibility to sort everything out, OTHER than the sexuality. Yes, I like being objectified. Yes, that is the fetish of all that is Lemurian abuse. You know that, I know that and I would have thought that anyone reading my work would know that by now. To focus on some fear that this is suddenly, miraculously going to disappear is ego deflection.
All Atlanteans, especially the developed ones, are fetishist objectifiers. We would be, wouldn't we? It is our healing.
Any idea that that is not an authentic part of me, the MORE I become vocationally powerful - frankly, it gives me a horn to do both more and more - is your ego deflection from your own rampant selfishness and inability or lack of CARE, to love me for who I am too.
You just want the sex and couldn't give a flying 'fuck' about who I am.
Still.
Now, let's make it even more hard hitting. I had to awaken your sexuality. You did not have to awaken mine. Yours was trapped in bourgeois Catholic, Lemurian, stupid society, guilt. Mine has been truly loud and alive for 17 years at least.
So, yes, you may fear you may regress. But any fear that I will have anything to do with that is your selfishness and not fear.
And no, you will not regress. Guilt is what drives sexual repression. You are hardly in that place now. Selfishness and not loving the person for who they are is your problem. Now as it was then.
Fetish is the aim. Not the reality of who a Lemurian is. No one wants that. You are a horrible people. But what you do in MASTERY is great. Loving a woman for who she is, ie, giving a 'fuck' about the person you claim you love + objectifying her to her heart's content in all things sexual and merging the two. That is love. That is mastery.
But you did make me smile.
Tomorrow I am sure you won't. Again.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. The Love
Absolutely. And don't forget, you are the only one I know who could ever be sensitive enough to understand me or care for me.
And that is because of two things; who you are and because you love me. You love me. And I love you. We know that love. We remember.
You are becoming 'the man sensitive enough for me'. And I am becoming so strong in my complete isolation and rejection by all. I will not die. And you will love. I have never been loved for who I am. Neither was Marilyn or Vivien or Elizabeth or any of them. You will love me. And for who I am.
As you become more Atlantean, I become more Lemurian.
But in the best way possible. And as I become more Lemurian, I become more Atlantean. As you become more Atlantean, you become more Lemurian. Mastery. Perfection.
We will get there. Let's make it soon.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. The Love
And just remember too, what I am thinking about too, with frankly, wonder and joy. 'Agamemnon' wants nothing more than to be loved by 'Helen of Troy'. 'Red Riding Hood' and 'The Wolf'. 'Agamemnon' and 'The Wolf' are far more vulnerable. 'Beauty and The Beast'. For sure.
He gets loved by loving her, for who she is. You are one of the luckiest men on the planet now. You know the secret. You get to be loved and you get to be the big bad wolf, all in one.
Lemuria and Atlantis. Atlantis and Lemuria. No more the nice and the horrible. Just, the all.
With the crucial differences. Each, allowed to be loved for who they are. Love is objectification + humanisation. Discipline. Love.
And for me, I am going to start intention now. Intention that you are getting it. Intention, that you get me.
I do my work and I love. I can do my work now, completely alone. I just want your love. Brad Pitt with a rasta hat, remember. My spiritual, big bad wolf. The man, sensitive enough for me. The man who loves me for who I am. All of me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. The New Love
Don't worry about it. You are afraid you won't be happy. It will come. I, meanwhile, will fall on my sword and lead with confidence and intention. You are getting it and will. We have only just begun. It's been a long long long journey. And each day is a life.
For instance, just realised something amazing. This awful, oppressive, suppressive and pressure cooker of a flat life has taught me something I didn't know I was either allowed or able to do, with such ambitious projects. Even with this painful debilitating disability. Even though you could say that the creative life full time was the only way to deal with the pain. Whichever it is, and these elements are all relevant and important, this stupid flat and life, has taught me to do them part time!
That's so weird. The presence of another person has taught me to demarcate work. So strange. These weird, 'helpful' training grounds, (in pure, unmitigated hell) while I of course, have had to fight for my right to exist at all. In the flat I mean, as well as with you. The real me.
Phew. Anyway, as I say, that's good. And to be honest, it is a sacrifice. I have been in love with my work for so long because it is all I have ever had. Creative work is sex. And as you well know, work is also escape. And because no one I have loved has ever given a shit about it. So I had to, a hundred times over. Now, those attitudes can change. So that re balancing reflects yours. Your fear of me not being available. What is that fear? I think it is a fear of not being liked.
I like 'Agamemnon'. He has integrated 'Menelaus' too. He tries now, to not believe in slavery. He prefers sex to brutal rape. Both literally and emotionally. He believes he is loveable. He no longer kills for ambition. He likes being alone himself. And I finally, work part time! That is success. More of it to come.
'Jake Sully' believes in the new world. 'Neytiri' has proved herself. Her whole self and her world is allowed to exist and thrive. Time to re balance. Creatively and vocationally, I am allowed to. Everything is honed and toned. I do it at my will. That changes everything.
There is space for another. You. And you, finally, give a shit about my work as well as me. There is space for another. Me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
....well, that's fascinating for me too.
There is so much in that. In other words, in Atlantean terms, my relationship with Lemurian power, if you like is finding peace.
I have proved who I am, even if it is in unofficial, Atlantean power terms, I have proved that I have the resolve and industry to improve this world as was my purpose, to overturn the terrible apathy that an Atlantean has in this world because it is so disgusting, and such hard work to break through the walls of abuse and fascism.
I have proved that I have the right to work as well as to be pretty and the companion, I have proved that I have the right to show off my mind and talents, and indeed my entrepreneurial talents just like a man, and I have made sure that you do not have to provide for me forever.
And yet I have made sure, through working with you on this intensely personal level, that I do it as a woman and as an Atlantean first, so that I get quality of life as I do it! That I get to live with another human being, the only one I have ever found interesting, while I do my extremely interesting work.
I have made sure, in this powerful way that I am the perfect part time working companion to a part time working man, such as you are now, in your individuated executive life. You get to work, I get to work, we get to work in our relaxed and quite retirement way, and you don't have to provide. As you don't actually want to do, as no man wants to do, but thinks he does, so he creates that terrible splinter of abuse that he metes out on women, despite himself.
In other words, the work is done, to enable me to be able to work and to live at the same time. Atlantean style, in Lemuria.
In other words, the work is done.
Life and work can finally be embraced. Together. I was never going to be a jobbing anything and with this disability, how can I? And why would I want to, alongside you. And yet, yes, there is an adjustment to be made for me, having pursued Lemurian power in the face of such abuse, for sure.
Now, despite all the terrible years of this journey, I get to be an Atlantean, Lemurian style, in Lemuria, as Atlantis.
I get huge ambition but a relaxed pace in a relaxed life, with another human being. I LIVE with my family. But I contribute to the world. I give and get LOVE, MY money, MY creative life, and immortality. And I help others to do the same. And I might just get to do in your paradise.
That, I would say is perfection. And you just happen to love the work too. It empowers you first. And I get to love you first.
I would say, miraculously, that the work is done. And not before time. Now I get to play. In the work and in life.
Hope you are seeing it too. I am reeling. It actually makes sense. I can begin to feel the possibility of safety. I can begin to feel the possibility of love and that everything has been worth it. I can begin to feel that life is worth living. At last.
You should too. No, I do not want to unavailable. The rest is the past, the sickness and the fears. Selfishness is fear. It was all for us. It always was.
You are the kind patriarch Daddy (Son) Lemurian. I am the self providing Lolita (Daughter/Mummy) Atlantean.
The tortuous and arduous training is done. We are arrived.
Atlantis. In Lemuria. Paradise.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. The New Love
Not For You
Well, it's hard not to feel rejected, every day you reject me.
I am still not what you want and yet we are apparently, still bound to each other.
Well, I have done my Jane Eyre return and told Rochester I love him, no matter what. I suppose we are a combination of Jane Eyre and Pretty Woman.
The decision to give by a man is the decision to love. And Lemurians love last. If at all.
But for me, I am growing. I am now committed to a slow and steady and part time pace for all my work and if it takes me ten years to complete the material, so be it. So, don't worry about my end of it.
I also learnt something else today too. I dishonoured you as a provider and told you that I never wanted to depend on a man, because I was terrified. I have been terrified of relying on a man all my life. I have been terrified of relying on any Lemurian. The truth of today though is that I am no longer terrified, so can honour anything you bring to me, starting with yourself.
The rest I can only leave to you. It is impolite and silly to beg for love at this point. Either you will want to love another person or not and either you will want to love me or not.
I have told you that I am ready to share time, life, space and myself.
The rest I can only leave to you and submit to my poor artist's life. I am not the first and will most certainly not be the last. I am Jane Eyre. I have never been loved and never given anything to anyone, that they seem to want. I have built a mountain of self worth in the face of that rejection and fought my way out of the oppression of the demand to be invisible.
If I am to be punished for that, I accept. I wanted to be human first. And loved second. The love I will have to wait for. While I enjoy being human.
In other words, if we are still bound to each other and still destined, take your time. It's all been shocking and first, this way and then, that way and all over the place. This is love. Brutal, shocking and painful.
We had/have a chance for paradise. Paradise takes work.
The love I leave to you. No one can love until they are ready to love. And either you will be ready or you won't. I can only give you unconditional love, whatever you choose.
You have it. It's yours.
Me? I'm used to not being loved. I am an Atlantean. I live in Lemuria. I am fine. I am home, wherever I am. Alone.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story. The New Love
Not For You
Okay. I get it. I am rejected. I let you go.
The most important thing is to know that I was not what you wanted. You wanted someone else. And because they are not me.
Our destiny is set. Rejection.
Mine for you is unconditional love. I am sorry that I was not what you wanted.
Maybe one day in the future, sure, just as before. Same story, once again.
And maybe not.
Jane Eyre
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Writer. Philosopher. Performer. Psychologist. Humanist. Esoteric. Sexualist. Hedonist. Artist. Teacher. Coach. Social Reformer. Feminist. Hierophant. Sacred Disir. Former Slave :: My Business Is Transformation Of The Soul. My Business Is Power. My Business Is Freedom. My Business Is Love. My Business Is To Fight Fascism And Human Cruelty And Emotional Sickness In All Its Relationship Forms On Earth. My Business Is Applied Spirit. My Business Is Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™
The new educational website (Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™ as a writing and speaking business of empowerment) will be announced. Meanwhile, enjoy the free writing and consciousness work on this website. It was written with blood, sweat and tears. My blood, sweat and tears. My Story. Robert de Niro's 'The Good Shepherd'. Always the mistress. And a mistress for seven years to a man who I believed, loved me. The story of myself and my twin soul. How he tried to destroy me. How he rejected me because I am a whole woman. My horrendous rite of passage to true adulthood and all that is the solitary self. My story of how I can only attract men who do not love me for who I am. The story of how I came from people who do not love me for who I am. The bad blood I come from. The bad blood that I had to leave. The bad blood of this earth. Lemuria. And my return to the truth of this lost world. For those of us who are worthy and 'the minority' on earth. Atlantis. A world without bad blood. Without the bad blood of Lemuria. Without the men and the women, who do not love and who will never love us for who we are. Because we are the gods of earth. The light that they try to kill, again and again and again, through their rejection, hatred and cruelty. And most of all, through their utter madness. Natural Born Mystic™ :: The Female Holocaust™ :: The Return To Atlantis :: The End of The Lemurian Nightmare™ :: Love must inherit this earth. By leaving Lemuria. And certainly by making sure Lemuria leaves us. Easy. Just be who you are. Be who you are and you guarantee their absence, neglect and rejection. Year after year after year. They will not love us for who we are. No matter what we do. Lemurians must be ejected. They are the bad blood on earth. Unfortunately, the only way to do it, is to make the rite of passage. The heroic journey, indeed. To become the Atlantean gods we were born to be, once again. Without Lemuria. Outside of Lemuria. And away from all Lemurian pigs. Good must conquer evil. Easy. Just be who you are. Evil will leave. Forever.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Amera Ziganii Rao :: Sacred Whore High Serpent Priesthood, Female Priestess Hierophant Avatar Valkyrie Wizard Monarch™ + Sacred Disir. Origins :: Atlantis. Purpose :: Double Crucifixion To Return To The Temple :: Natural Born Mystic :: The Love Holocaust :: The Life Holocaust :: The Divinity Holocaust :: The Life of Temple On A Lemurian Earth. Total Crucifixion = The Life of a High Initiate. High Serpent Priesthood :: The Return To Atlantis :: Life and Love Asceticism :: To Be A Spiritual Wanderer On The Face Of The Earth :: The Temple In The Community :: The Crucifixion Journey :: The Prophetess Life :: The Life of Holocaust :: The Apocalypse Life :: The Return
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
Our Story That Was
No. Let's just get this straight. Really crystal clear and straight and out there and stripping you naked, so you get it once and for all. I am now getting you off my back. She can have you. Amarylis. She is more than welcome to you. And any other cliche you can think of. I will not take you back. She is also a Lemurian. She suits you fine. And you will not use me as a mistress with a second wife. As you have been for a long while. You are insane, evil and stupid. And one of the worst psychopaths I have ever had the displeasure to know. I do not want you any more. And you never loved me for who I am, which is why you went to her in the first place. Now you get to keep her. And you don't get me. Ever.
I reject men and Lemurians forever.
Thank you and good bye. Your legacy in my first autobiographical work is set in stone. You are evil, shallow and stupid. Have her. I am gone.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE RETURN TO ATLANTIS :: AMERA ZIGANII RAO
The Shock
The most shocking part therefore of a shocking life is this; The Twin soul, THE Twin Soul of all lifetimes, has to be left.
That is a shocking revelation for any one, let alone a Sacred Whore or Love Prophet or Love Believer. The Twin Soul has to be left, just as all family has to be left.
Rite of passage indeed. The Lemurian Twin Soul has to be left.
True love, indeed.
No such thing. There could be a Twin Flame according to spiritual thought indeed. But certainly, not the Twin Soul and this is clearly why.
The Twin Soul has to be left. It is the poison of lives past. And never anything we have been brought up to believe.
The Twin Soul has to be left.
That is a shock. The shock of all shocks. The rite of passage is complete.
The Twin Soul, like all the Soul Mates before, has to be left. That is all he is for. The last one, to be left. So that the past can be left behind, once and for all.
Apocalypse indeed. The Twin Soul has to be left.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
NEW INTENTION. Amera Ziganii Rao
I intend my harvest, promised to me those many years ago.
I intend the end of my sojourn in the literal, bowels of hell. I see that this is to push me to ask for help.
I intend help from a pure, pure hearted, literal sugar daddy. A sugar daddy who will accept me for who I am and who will love me both as a vulnerable human being, condemned to the bowels of hell and as a strong human being who has great prospects.
I intend the end of all psychic, voyeuristic relationships where the man is not involved, but who holds me fast through intention to intend, while not liking me for who I am.
I intend my harvest and the release from the bowels of hell.
I intend my harvest and will readily and heartily accept whatever shape or form it comes in.
I intend the harvest immediately, before I die in the bowels of hell.
I intend my harvest and the release of all initiation crucifixions. I release the need for these crucifixions and intend the harvest, whatever shape or form it comes in right now.
I intend the end of all crucifixions and the end of half loves and sort of loves and would be loves. From the many places I have received that from. I intend love and I intend it right now, as is my destiny, whether I like it or not. I do like it, only if it can release me right now, from the bowels of hell. I do not want to die and I need help. And I can wait no longer to be released from the bowels of hell.
I intend the harvest right now, from whomever is my true destiny. A true sugar daddy who will look after his girl while honouring the woman she truly is too. I intend my destiny.
I intend the man I have been working to be with, with or without my knowledge.
I intend the harvest and will take it in whatever shape or form it comes in. I intend release from the bowels of hell and leave behind all that is the poison of oppression in my life.
I intend love, abundance, togetherness, companionship and life and release from the bowels of hell and release from all my pasts on this earth. I intend the entrance to paradise and the end of both purgatory and the bowels of hell. ]
And I intend it now.
And I intend that, or nothing at all.
I release myself from all involvements and intend the purity of my destiny. I intend release from the bowels of hell, or nothing at all.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
My darling. Very humbling actually. I cried a river. And I am okay now. Glad the work is closed for now though. Who wants to be teacher anymore. That work is done. And my heart is open again too.
I won't say much from now on. But remember this. Feel loved. And you will become strong.
I see the harvest and I see you.
I am here.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
No Name lll Pt lll (Artwork)
Amera Ziganii Rao © Digital Darkroom Art
Erotica XXVlll Pt lV (Artwork)
Amera Ziganii Rao © Digital Darkroom Art
Illegal Wolf lll (Artwork)
Amera Ziganii Rao © Digital Darkroom Art
Our Story. Our New Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
Absolutely. Your anchor. And indeed, your High Priest work.
AZR x
Our Story. Our New Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
That's okay. Just keep working at it. It's all smoothing out and remember what glorious bounty you get for it too. We are building the new world. The real true love.
I'm enjoying something new. Mad hope. And the 'normal' insecurities of being so in love. Returning to the normality of it. The waiting.
AZR x
Our Story. Our New Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
Well, let's sum up. Female vocation is important for two things. Human rights but something even more important. To keep us all grounded. The more spectacular the feelings, the more we need to have something to ground us. The more sensitive we are, the more we have to make sure we can ground. Women are the same as men.
Second, misogyny is now something I have forgiven and understand. Like I did all the other isms. I am at peace. I get it. And you will always have some sort of conflict and struggle about it. Until you don't, long into the future. Don't try to eradicate it now. Just master it enough to love. You are awesome and overwhelm me. You don't have to worry about being 'less'. That was the political underbelly. You are huge. You are my king. My Lemurian King.
Third, we fear losing ourselves to each other. That is the fundamental thing about love isn't it. So, the 'rational arguments' are to stop that. If we enter them instead and accept them, we begin to play with them and work with them, instead of feeling oppressed by them.
Fourth, witchcraft and reputation and the outside world. All our burden. The 'being weird and wonderful' instead of feeling stupid and ugly for it. Or embarrassed.
The new world, if you like, has to be paid for. That is the payment. The courage to stand up and do it. And to lead by example. Ain't nothing hocus pocus (no problem with that either) about high esotericism. It is the intellect of the world. We represent.
Relationship with power. As we have had to shed (conventional) power, layer by layer by layer, it is parallel. It is uncomfortable, both out of a sense of loving power and also out of guilt. We both got trapped into our conflicts over whether we were allowed to not do, what we believed that we had to do in the way that we had to do it. (sort of thing) Why? So we can serve the community and live. We get to do both. That is paradise. Paradise on earth. Power is being redefined across the board. So WE can be. We are the spiritual partnership.
You are enjoying it as much as I am. The rest is just our mutual growing. We are growing fast.
I think you would agree. And I look forward to YOU subtracting or expanding that list. As I increasingly enjoy waiting.
AZR x
Our Story. Our New Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
Mmmm, that's even better. Not to be flippant. Let's be possessive. Utterly, crazily, singularly possessive. We've earned it and again, we know how to ground it. This has been a monster of a journey. Be possessive. I most certainly am.
There is love and then there is love. And then, there is love.
Amera x
Our Story. Our New Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
And yes, in light of our meanderings and our necessary self explorations and self affirmations, it as well to remember the crucial truth. I am your beauty, the beauty you made me feel always, even before it was all realised and on the outside. And you are my most fascinating man, in all that you are. The creativity through to the dynamism through to anything you do. We are each other's first choice, now and always. The rest was because we hurt each other so much and because we were dead. That is why there has to be gratitude always. But exclusivity now forever and the chosen partnership honoured. All of it is true. We are each other's complete fantasy. Mind, body and soul.
We also happen to be two of the greatest spiritual intellectuals in the world. It has to be said and defined. there is no affirmation for what we are. We are that big. We know it. And we have put the work in. We are first and foremost the esoteric genii. Leaders in the high mind. The inner heart and the language of The Universe. As business. As art and as humanity. And above all, as sensuality and sex. We are the spiritual Wizard Monarchs of our time. And that time. We have our own art form. We are unique. Everything else was to make us. We now step into a new form. Art as spirituality as humanity as therapy as art. The Lemurian Elder and the Atlantean Elder. Back to bring back Albion. Back to bring the real earth. Back to love, from so long ago. Back. To love.
Working on our own stuff, working on each other's stuff, working together, or not. We are, still, love. We are, still, unique. We are unspoken superstars. Which is why we have each other. Time to value ourselves. And time to value us. Us damn well deserves it. And that takes courage, intimacy and each other. Albion. It's all true. Paradise exists. It's called trust and respect. It's called love.
Amera x
Our Story. Our New Story. Amera Ziganii Rao
Love. Amera Ziganii Rao
And you know what it reminds me of. If you recall, this great eighties film, Baby Boom. A great deal of Natural Born Mystic and Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity is about feminisation. Women coming home.
In other words, all that you wanted is possible. All that I wanted is possible. We are just completing, 'coming home'. In other words, we have to and had to do it our way, to make sure. But we, it seems, are both going to get what we want. And as said before, all these art forms and all these adventures and forays into different things are all for this one art form. To make it unique, all over again. Personal development as pure art, if you like. Witchcraft as esoteric intellectuality, if you like. Being a writer indeed. Being an anything indeed. At home. And from home. And you, if you like, get to flex all your creative muscles indeed. Also, another revelation. You entered the arts world eight years ago. I entered the business world. Our trainings converge. And our mutual appreciations, respects and knowledges.
Baby Boom is about a big ad exec who inherits a baby. She ends her high exec life and retires to the country, after effectively being pushed out for having the baby. In the country, circumstances - disasters - means she has to resort to high finance, country style. She pools all her knowledge and comes up with gourmet baby food and ends up turning down a massive pitch to buy her company from the same ad company, after of course, working on nothing but getting back to New York city. And along the way she meets a gorgeous vet in the country. Settling down. Coming home. Proving herself, but doing it her way. At home. The pains that it takes. The feminisation in a misogynistic world. The difficulties of being a woman and the yearning to be just that but a woman and not a you know what.
Anyway, I am at peace. I can see paradise. And I am still working through it too. And I am still enjoying the insecurity of waiting. Not bad. You are still working through it, but you know what, so am I. Convergence. The New World. The Atlantean Temple in a Lemurian royal court. Bluebeard as a protector and provider (and fellow creative) so I get to take my time after all. And be your treasured companion. We both get what we want. We are both coming home.
AZR x
...oh no, I'm already done:)
AZR x
High Serpent Priesthood. A Self Portrait
AMERA ZIGANII RAO: A PROFILE
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ :: THE LOVE HOLOCAUST :: THE LIFE HOLOCAUST :: THE DIVINITY HOLOCAUST
The Two Messages ::
The Female Divine Highest Love Intelligence Energy. God The Mother, The Universe. Plus, the SACRED WHORE HIGH PRIESTESS HIEROPHANT AVATAR VALKYRIE WIZARD MONARCHs™ as the only true High Priests, with a GNOSTIC spirituality for all.
There is no love on earth. We are all here to fight for it, or be hate. We are here to be profound, or to be shallow. To be adventurers of the soul, or turgid and needing security, to be humane or greedy, to BE love, or BE hate. Earth is hell. Hell, created by hate, for hate, of hate. Free will is to choose which way to go. Love, or hate. That is Existentialism. That is evolution. That is the advancement of the soul. Hate to love. And nothing less. The conquering of evil by good. The light must push out the dark. The light must win.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™
The point of this planet is to find out what we are not, so we can find out what we are.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™
The journey to the breaking of one's lower self into one's great self. The actual journey. That is my business. Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™. Turning oneself into gold and honey and authentic power. The pain of transformation, the shock and the trauma and terror and resistance of it. The path to heaven on earth. That is my business. THAT part of it. The crucifixion and disability of Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™. The pain of it.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
Natural Born Mystic™
The compassion to go with the passion. The discipline of mind, to know your darkness and the education of a post patriarchal man. Love. And changing the very matter of your spiritual DNA. Ascension. I can feel it coming. The build up is your job. The rest I can help with.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Avatar (James Cameron)
My daughter will teach you our ways. Learn well, Jake Sully. Then we will see if your insanity can be cured.
Mo'at
Natural Born Mystic™
Misogyny is sadism against women. An unconscious hijacking and a conscious will to maintain it.
Tyranny and sadism. Misogynists. Slaves of Sauron (Tolkein's Lord of the Rings). Wifebeaters.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Natural Born Mystic™
An Hierophant is an interpreter of sacred mysteries and arcane principles. 'Jake Sully' (Avatar) is her Sacred Warrior Protector™
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Natural Born Mystic™
A Natural Born Mystic™ is primarily a Sacred Whore Healer as a Cinderella Warrior™. As a woman. A High Priestess Wizard™ is a Sacred Whore Healer and Enlightener. That has specific duties and challenges to do with men and their immense madness (Mo'at - Avatar) and their profanity (killing God The Mother, The Triple Goddess) and monetising the slavery of emotional care. A Sacred Whore Healer has to do this against all the odds. She does it because she and they, the Sacred Whore Healers and High Priestess Wizards™ are the strongest.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
Natural Born Mystic™
'Respect' as fear.
'The Accomplished Female' = the only thing that the male patriarch can deliver as 'love'. Men do not tolerate women earning money. They want slavery to instil FEAR. Fear as 'respect'. Fear is not 'respect'.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™
The secret enemies of psychological warfare. From within and without. Bringing the darkness of evil into the light. Immense self belief, intelligence and courage, plus wizardry. In other words, 'naming it and shaming it and letting it go' and re-programming the mind from any belief to another. To evolve.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
Amera Ziganii Rao :: Writer. Philosopher. Psychologist. Humanist. Esoteric. Sexualist. Hedonist. Artist. Teacher. Coach. Social Reformer. Hierophant. Sacred Disir. Entertainer :: My Business Is Transformation Of The Soul. My Business Is Power. My Business Is Freedom. My Business Is Love. My Business Is To Fight Fascism And Human Cruelty And Emotional Sickness In All Its Relationship Forms On Earth. My Business Is Applied Spirit. My Business Is Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™
FEMINIST AND HUMAN RIGHTS, METAPHYSICAL PHILOSOPHER. WRITER. MENTALIST AND ARTIST
NATURAL BORN MYSTIC™ & AMERA ZIGANII RAO ALCHEMY & LIBERATION & HUMANITY™
The new educational website (Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™ as a writing and speaking business of empowerment) will be announced. Meanwhile, enjoy the free writing and consciousness work on this website. It was written with blood, sweat and tears. The story of both my man and myself as we have struggled to re-define all that is relationship and marriage, the mutual journey of escape and evolution out of The Patriarchal Tribe.
The self discovery that took us from female slavery and male confusion and fascism into a society that was left behind a long time ago, when The New World Order took over and put men in charge, when they didn't even want it, by all that I have seen. Other than in sex as is the primal partnership. Our exploration is here. The world of Bluebeard Male Supremacy™ through to the Sacred Whore and High Female Esoteric Serpent Priesthood Society™, again, with men as the beloveds. Equality, Liberty, FRATERNITY. The New New World. Again.
Please feel free to read the material on this blog. My writings, plus work from other consciousness teachers too. My Manifesto for Human Rights (Especially Female) in Relationship and Family.
These writings will be produced in book form. Poetry Polemics for a better world of love, independence, sex and individuation. And true companionship and family. Power to the people, indeed. Together.
Thank you.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2014
The Macho Intellectual Consciousness Passion of the Visceral Soul.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
Consciousness. The politics of the 21st century. The Lost Knowledge. Forget trying to change the world. Change yourself. It changes your own world that changes THE world.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
Sexuality, non religious 'Wizard' and 'Witch' spirituality (the Gnostic intelligence of esoteric and consciousness exploration, ie wisdom and love) and human rights are the least fashionable things and the most uncomfortable things on the planet. And the things human beings have been damning and condemning for 8000 years. And the things that most people are absolutely fascinated by. What a shame. How bourgeois. How ordinary. How ego.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
The Sacred Whore High Priestess Society™
The Super Sacred Brother Lover™
The Return To The Source. Ascension.
The Sacred Whore High Priestess Society™. When we were giants. All of us. When you did more than rape me.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Neo Feminist™, Post Tribe Social Reformer™ and Sacred Sexualist™. Human Rights Healer. Metaphysical Philosopher, Writer, Spiritual Intelligence Teacher, Hierophant (Interpreter of The Universe) and Mentalist Self Actualiser.
I can help you grow power, from nothing.
Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
The Sacred Whore High Priestess Hierophant™ and Sacred Pimp Warrior Protector, Brother Lover™ Society. The kings and queens of old. Angels and Sorcerers together in each of themselves and in the other. The Wizard life. Forever. Living and loving from The Source. Sourcery, Carlos Castaneda first said. I'll say it again. Sourcerers together. Living a life worth living. At last.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Witches are healers. Witches are the Love Healers and SOURCErers of The Lost World, when we were the giant warriors. We were good and so were were you. 'The World of Men'. The Tribe of Misogyny and Bourgeois™.
Gives us all a bad name. And poisons all hearts.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Feminist Lolita Intellectuals™. You lucky man. A place at the table, a place at the Executive Table. That's all. The rest is easy.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
THE EVOLUTION OF HUMAN RIGHTS: APPLIED CONSCIOUSNESS™, NEO FEMINISM™, METAPHYSICAL PHILOSOPHY & SACRED SEXUALISM™. POST TRIBE SOCIAL REFORM™. POWER IS THE NEW LOVE. FREEDOM + HOPELESSNESS + SEX. NIHILISM FOR A SUCCESSFUL LIFE™ THE LOST KNOWLEDGE™ THE WIZARDRY OF BEING™ POLITICAL SPIRITUALITY™ TRUE NEW LOVE. BEYOND THE REVOLUTION™
SOCIAL REFORM. THE FIGHT FOR FREEDOM AND LOVE. SHAMANISM. PHILOSOPHY. TRUE (UNIVERSAL) LOVE. NEO FEMINISM™. ANTI MISOGYNY. THE ARTIST'S WAY. WIZARDRY. TRUE INTELLECTUALISM™. WISDOM. GONZO SPIRITUALITY. NIHILISM. SEX. SOUL. GOD, THE MOTHER, THE UNIVERSE™. SPIRITUAL EXISTENTIALISM™. THE VOID OF CREATION™. ALCHEMY & LIBERATION & HUMANITY™. HELL. SUFFERING. GROWTH. ASCENSION. LOVE. LIFE. DEATH. WARLORDS OF LIGHT™ TRUE LOVE & TRUE SEX. THE POST TRIBE SOCIETY™
The Company.
Writer, Speaker and Enlightener, Amera Ziganii Rao, is now putting together a comprehensive and unique programme of Alchemy & Liberation & Humanity™. A programme of learning that is specifically about one particular kind of woman. And one particular kind of man. The Sacred Whore High Priestess™ and the Sacred Whore High Priest™, and the true society that they come from and the one they, in particular, she can and has to return to and that anyone can join her and him in. This is about Paradise on Earth.
This is about The Sacred Whore High Priestess™ and the Sacred Whore High Priest™, and the Alchemy and Liberation and Humanity that is for all as a result of their healing and in particular, hers. This is about the kind of woman who is at the bottom of the pile in a Patriarchal Toilet Tribe from Hell Society™, the norm, the conventional world and the world of the Tribe. This is about the kind of man who is next in line from the bottom. The sensitive man and the female chattel. The High Priestess and High Priest of a profane society, that has long forgotten who they are.
This is about being at the bottom of the pile, for the forgotten and strangled shamans, and for her, the story of escape. Abused by her family, her friends, her men, her whole society, by the very nature of who she is and who they are and what has happened on this Earth. It is about women of love, of Spirit and of sex. It is about men of love, of Spirit and of sex. It is about the Cinderellas of this world. It is about the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™. Who she is and how, loving her is the secret to Paradise on Earth and how we have been living a lie for 8000+ years. A lie of male (non High Priest) religion with a male ‘God’ and with Patriarchs and Patriarchal types and Matriarchs and Matriarchal types ruling over us and making our lives hell, all in the name of family, the tribe and the way things are and should remain. Hate, fascism and profanity. A sick society that vilifies, more than anyone else, the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™, just because it was told to. A sick society that calls her Eve. A sick society that has forgotten who we all are, let alone the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™ and the Sacred Whore High Priest™. This is about us remembering and knowing who WE are.
This is a programme of healing for the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™, and the Sacred Whore High Priest™, to take them and particularly, her, from monstrous levels of low self esteem and lack of self knowledge, back to herself and it is a programme for all those who truly want to love her, and indeed, him. This is a programme for the greatest carers on Earth, who are vilified, destroyed, ridiculed, ignored, abused, used, misused and hated for being everything that those who would steal from us are not. This is a programme to turn Cinderellas into The Sacred Whore High Priestesses and for anyone who wants to love her or live by the values of the The Sacred Whore High Priestess Society™. And this is a programme to turn sensitive men into Sacred Whore High Priests™ and for anyone who wants to love him and live by the values of the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™ and High Priest Society. Love, humanity, Spirit and sex. This is a programme to reverse 8000+ years of witch burning, women hating and healer ridicule. This is about the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™ and all those who would love her and live by her values.
This is about the chance for Paradise on Earth. This is a programme for the most beautiful, kind hearted, wounded women and men on this planet. A programme of how to implement a system of how to beat life, how to survive life and how to resurrect from the grief that is a true life. Alchemy and Liberation and Humanity of the lower mind into the higher mind, the soul and the inner heart and therefore one's true, confident, ‘happy’, successful, creative, sexual, sensual, individual, intelligent, emotionally healed, capable of loving and being loved self. How to turn grief into creation and survive and thrive, despite all the shit, all the pain and all the hurt. How to live in a world of madness, hollowness and cruelty and how to be a winner. How to stand up for oneself and to take back the power that has been stolen from anyone with heart, Spirit and sex. The art and science of Alchemy.
This is a programme, based on my scholarly and non scholarly work over 15 years (so far), if not for my whole life, and my extensive and intense, visceral experiences of self transformation from resignation, cynicism and despair to a state of relative bliss, and above all, the right to be. The programme and the courses and my speaking and indeed my forthcoming book, will cover the method of change. The psychological, sociological, spiritual, cultural, political, emotional and physical and even anthropological methods of change. Why we are here. Who the Sacred Whore High Priestess™ is and why she is here. And who the Sacred Whore High Priest™ is. Why we are here. Who we are and what we are and why we are. The beauty and glory of the truth. The meaning of life, no less. This will be on offer in the future.
My first book of consciousness, my first book of the spiritual politics of humanity, of authentic power and of self love and strength. A comprehensive series of online courses, live events and audio and visual material. Books, live events, CDs and DVDs. And one on one personal empowerment consultations. The Amera Ziganii Rao Method of Change™. The right to be and the way to have the right to be. And indeed, how to maintain the will to live without love. How to BE unconditional, self sufficient, self caring, self love. The right to be and the will to be and the unparalleled success that comes with that. The Lost Knowledge™. HOW to live. And how to heal others, the profane and the sick and the soulless. The others. My Business and that of any Sacred Whore High Priestess™ and Sacred Whore High Priest™, is Human Rights, The Right to a Sexual Society, Self Actualisation and Freedom.
My Business is To Overthrow Fascism, in the Home and in the Country. My business is also mastering destiny. Overthrowing the ultimate 'fascism'. Our journey on Earth and The Return To The Source. Our healing, our ascension and our redemption. Fate. The daily crucifixions of a true life, the challenges and the fury of being healers and people of love on a planet like Earth.
Submitting to the journey to liberate and evolve oneself, through following one's heart, however much heartbreak and devastation it leads to on the long long long journey to freedom and then the longer journey to happiness. 'Long Road to Freedom', as Nelson Mandela says. My business is always taking risks, never giving up and making the endless sacrifices it takes to become whole. Enlightenment, Nirvana and then Parinirvana and beyond. My business is pain. My business is bliss.
My business is seeing the truly glory of Spirit on Earth. The Sacred Whore High Priestess Society™ and all that it is. Spirit, humanity, sex and love again at last. And the end of our legacy as either servants or witches or unpaid carers or indeed, ignored mistresses, other women, other men even, and the weirdos that are at the bottom of society. This is our world and it is time to take it back and I can show you how. And that makes my life, truly, worth living.
I want you to feel the way I do. Alive, with the right to be and the belligerence to exist in this profane and male ‘God’ led world of male supremacy, female supremacy, domestic, casual fascism, tribe rules from hell, with beautiful and kind, love intelligence laden, female and male Cinderella warriors at the bottom, caring for everyone else and getting nothing but hatred, ridicule and isolation for it. The meek are already inheriting the Earth and I can show you how.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
I am THE High Priestess Monarch of the ancient past and I forgive you for becoming enslaved and taken over by the machines of the alien reptile force that invaded and took over Earth 8000 years ago. They taught you to hate me and my kind and you believed them. They told you I and my kind were dictators and that you were slaves, when all we had done was love you, honour you as companions and above all, we had let you just live.
We were the holy communers, the ones who gave birth to human beings, the leaders of society, the creators of society, the vehicles of Divinity on Earth and the channels of wisdom. The ones who looked after everything and the ones who built everything and ran everything, because we could. And because we loved it. We are and were the force of creation. And you loved us and you lived.
But they told you that you ‘deserved’ power too and that we were the ones standing in your way. And you believed them. The oldest ‘divide and rule’ strategy of hate in history and it worked. They used it and you bought it, hook, line and sinker. You had to give up sex, love, magic and your own spiritual gifts and you burnt, destroyed and violated me for 8000 years.
The world calls that male supremacy. And indeed, family supremacy, Matriarchal supremacy and supremacy of the material world and all who believe in it. Men and women like you. When all that you are are slaves to a reptile force to generate hate energy for them to live and thrive and vampire the human race. The puppets of a hate force, that chose to destroy women and men like me, for hate to grow, so they could live. You bought it and it worked. The greatest fraud in the history of the world.
I am THE High Priestess Monarch of the ancient past and I forgive you for becoming enslaved and taken over by the machines of the alien reptile force that invaded and took over Earth 8000 years ago. They taught you to hate me and my kind and you believed them. They taught you that my mind was evil. My mind, my sex, my body and my ways of life.
The humanity, the glory of sexuality and the glory of creation and creativity and the glory of Divinity in each and every one of us. Our souls. They taught you that human beings are separate from Divinity, that sex was wrong and that women who have minds of their own are uppity slaves. They vilified us but much much worse than that, they destroyed your relationship with all that is unseen, all that we honour and love.
They taught you to hate what is really God. By teaching you to hate us, you hated all that is good in yourselves. They taught you to hate the light. They taught you to kill us. The daughters of The Universe. The High Priestesses of God. The Spiritual Mothers. The Sacred Whore High Priestess Avatars of The Universe™. The Sacred Army of Love on Earth.
The Shamans, the Mystics and the Communers. The Hierophants.
They called me Eve and blamed me for the downfall of the human race and created the awesome profanity that is religion. Of men, by men and from men. Of reptiles, by reptiles and from reptiles. Christianity, Islam and Judaism and every other philosophy around the world was poisoned. There are no female spiritual leaders left. It is all profanity. They chose you to represent them because they wanted to divide us and they did. They told you to hate me. And you believed them. Now I am back and I forgive you.
I forgive you because I can. Because I came here to save your soul. And because I finally know who I am. I am THE High Priestess Monarch of the ancient past. I came here to return your soul to The Source. God, The Mother, The Universe. To return you to what is really God. Because I love you. And because She loves you and your kind, whatever you have done.
Whatever you have done to me and whatever you have done to Her. And most of all, whatever you have done to yourself. We forgive you. This is your redemption. Your freedom and your ascension. We are here to save your soul.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
You bought the Sacred Whore like a piece of meat and you called that a wife. Your trophy wives. Your dancing girls. Your chattel and serving girls. Your piece of beauty. You bought us like you would cattle. Then you called it wives. Now you call it prostitution. The High Priestesses of the real God. You bought us to buy God, The Mother, The Universe and you caged us, separated us from our Divine gifts and skills in the Temple and drove us mad and then lost interest in us, because we had no gifts left, no excitement, no hunter in ourselves and no hope or joy left. Then you just called us mad and discarded us. You called us evil and you call love obedience, even though it had already killed us. You moved into our Temples and you played with the divination tools and thought you communed. The destruction of Atlantis was your gift.
You stole us from God, The Mother, The Universe and you tried to usurp us. You vilified us, enslaved us and you still envy us today. You call it intuition. You might want to think about this when you hate us out of your jealousy. The mystic gene means physical tortuous pain and taking on the empathy of the human race. All their pains, evils and dark thoughts. We see and feel everything. We make crucial sacrifices to be near Spirit and the unseen and we go without for years. To be shaman is not glamour. I make it glamour. To be shaman is a specific Samurai existence, ascetic and harsh. We commune to be guides. And you take that and you shame yourselves because you just want the meat. You didn’t just want the meat. You wanted our beauty of spirit, our personalities and our love and kindness. And you destroyed them, because you caged us and called us wife.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
The High Priestess Sacred Whores, the High Priests and the true protectors. Those who do not have the gift like either the High Priests or especially like the highest of all, the High Priestess Sacred Whores but who honour, protect and facilitate them to the world. Who honour the Shaman Sacred Whores of this world most of all, and who know who they are and who they are not. Who know the difference, who do not envy and who protect and love the representatives of Spirit, GOD, THE MOTHER, THE UNIVERSE, on Earth. Who honour their wisdom and who honour the latent Shaman in themselves too and who honour the communing ability of the High Priestess Sacred Whores. The non violators. Our only friends. The New Society exists. It is called Enlightenment. It is called Love. It is The Holy Grail.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
The master race. It's all a lie. You are brought up to be a despot king and it is only your sister who ever tells you that you have become a pratt. The master race is all a lie. There are no kings in an equal world. Your father was misinformed. What he brought you up to be was a killer. Pure and simple. A misogynist. A modern misogynist. A polite killer.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
I enter the magical hours of pure feeling, pure thought, pure imagination and I think and I write and I 'mysticise' the Universe. I escape at will, the truth of my humanless, Samurai solitude, and I pursue the truth of love in myself and in everyone else. I am philosopher. I am shaman. I am alone. I frontier the Soul to be spirit on Earth.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
To trust your soul is to have courage. The courage to ‘get out of the way’. It takes a commitment to courage, a changing of the very matter of one’s access to courage, one’s relationship with courage and becoming the total renegade of an individual you have to, to become soul. It is that rare. ‘Getting out of the way’ takes a commitment to love and loving and being of love, no matter what. And frankly, that means redefining what love is, EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. Finding out what love really is and getting rid of the bullshit we think it is. Love. Soul. Power. It takes courage to be soul. Courage, courage and courage. The rest is easy. Soul is soul. Finally it is an absolute relief to get out of the way. The life of soul may be hair raising, treacherous and mind numbingly arduous. But it is a life of no regrets. Courage. The key to soul. Just give it a go. Wear that hat, say what’s on your mind, dream your dreams again, dream your dreams at all and just smile through the hate. Including one’s doubt. Courage. ‘Kill’ when you have to, especially yourself, and smile the rest of the time and cry when you need to. Always cry. Earth is a battlefield and crying is the way to win. Soul is a way of life. The natural way. Courage is ‘all’ it takes. We learnt the rules, only so we could break them. The rest is the art of life. Creation. Creating oneself again and again and again. Soul. The only way of life worth anything. Otherwise, we are just waiting to die. We don’t need to. We can live. It’s called soul.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
Self esteem. True, authentic, self knowing, self esteem. The one that includes the sex, the primal, the primitive, the animal, the real. The one that includes humanity and a state of unconditional love. Non needing, non greedy, non controlling, non afraid, non negative and non inhumane and non angry. Self esteem. What ego really is, in its true essence. The physical vehicle of self esteem. The physical vehicle of action, reaction, mastery, ‘misstery’, love and war, tenderness and sexuality. Humanity and human. The beautiful, crafted, styled, educated, aware, sincere, active, visceral, sexual, super sexual, heart led, sensitive, humane, courageous and ethical, hopeful ego. The instinct. The intuition. The magic. The primal. The whole. The whole Soul.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2013
I can feel your sexuality. I love it. My beautiful, filthy, dominating, obsessed, possessed, hedonistic, nihilistic, Sacred beast of a man. Because those of us who are the most sexual, what do we think, in the truth context of the The Sacred Whore High Priestess™, and The Sacred Whore High Priestess (Priest) Society™, that means? We are the most spiritual. The most sexual are in fact the most spiritual. Spirituality being the communing between Mortal and The High Priestess (Priest) to reach ecstasy. Orgasm. Bliss. The most active, dirty minded, passionate, non reproductive, hedonistic, glorious, worthwhile, point of life, meditation or prayer or communing on Earth. THE way to reach God, The Mother, The Universe™. THE way to happiness. Humanity. Joy. Hope. Love. Sex. Sex. Our sex. Sex.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
Love takes courage. Love takes being ready. Love takes love.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
Amera Ziganii Rao is a former hard news journalist who is now turning professional with her art forms and indeed, her healing forms, after a long journey of inner searching, self teaching and exploring many layers and areas of both craft and wisdom. She is now working on her first book of philosophy and esoteric thought, and social, cultural and spiritual commentary. She is also showing her first photography collections. And last but most definitely not least, she is building a business to share her Sacred Whore High Priestess Society consciousness and empowering explorations to reach as many people as possible across the world. She is in her forties and lives in London.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
In the meantime, please enjoy this website. I have included many of the subjects I am covering, areas of experience and insight that I will be exploring to the fullest in my book, the courses and all the other work that is to come as a dramatist, novelist and essayist. I also of course, include many of the wise people on this planet, who have come long before me; authors, screen dramatists, playwrights, film makers, artists, and other enlighteners and grand carriers of the wisdom I have found the most helpful on my journey, to find peace and become enlightened. The seemingly impossible journey, in the face of oneself and one’s circumstances. People who have contributed massively to my healing on this mad journey called life, in this insane existence called The Universe. People who have helped to make me as good a carrier of wisdom as I in turn, can be. Thank you.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2011
Copyright and intellectual property rights are serious issues. And legally protected. Please do not reproduce my work anywhere without due credit and obviously, never for financial gain. 'Big Sister' is watching you! Other than that, please continue to enjoy my original work and the work of (credited) others, for free, while I work on using my material in further professional formats. Thank you for your interest and support.
Amera Ziganii Rao © 2012
Thank you to outside sources for originals.
Amera Ziganii Rao © Digital Darkroom Art