Exhale. A Self Portrait
Sikivu Hutchinson
Yes. When you find out that the person you regarded as your best friend in the world, in a way no one else in the world had ever been or ever would be, and you find out that this friend, this love, this heart that is your heart, is not your friend in any way whatsoever, because he doesn't fundamentally care for who you truly are, and you find out that the whole world institutionally tells him to do that, to hate me, to hate a person like me, a woman, a sage, scientist and artist. The Sacred Whore. The equal. The superior. Sophia, the High Love mother goddess. When you find out that the man you love with a divine depth of humanity, empathy, unconditional love and care, you have never even felt before, is actually programmed to kill you, emotionally, psychologically, anthropologically and primarily vocationally, because the whole world has programmed him to do so, yes, you want to die.
One day, the man who loves me, will be my friend.
Amera Ziganii Rao ©
To make sexuality sacred, and love, holy and wise. And I am not talking about religion. The return of the Sacred Whore society. The Sacred Whore and the Sacred Pimp. The return of life to Earth. The real presence of God on the planet again. In our hearts, loins and bodies. And now, in our minds.
Amera Ziganii Rao ©
The whole point about ego is that it means you have power the wrong way round. The boundaries of the angry toddler are still intact. It means we don't trust our strength. We know we are arseholes deep down, so we hold back. In a man, it's very straightforward to visualise. Hard hearts and floppy loins. Moral outrage instead of sexuality, selfishness and bullying and judgment, and of course jealousy, instead of support and friendship. Being dominant when you shouldn't be and certainly not being dominant enough when you should be. A hard heart and soft loins. Not a very attractive package all round really. Ego. Gets in the way doesn't it.
Amera Ziganii Rao ©
The will to love is not enough. Those of us who search, want to have the ability to love too. And therefore be sure we are receiving love in any moment too. And love is a skill, like any other.
Amera Ziganii Rao ©
Why? Because there is nothing sexier and more inspiring and victorious than a reformed sadist. A man who can love.
And indeed, a man who can fuck.
Amera Ziganii Rao ©
.jpg)
